There has been one person in my life who felt it necessary to make sure that he made my life a living hell. When he died, I realized then that I shall be forever indebted to him for giving me a priceless gift. That gift is knowing how not to be-like him.

I have been through different experiences yet all have a common theme. While I spent many years trying to find that barely measurable amount of time as an opportunity to go for it or not and try my damnedest to keep some kids alive. Being successful in my effort to breach that small crack of time to be next to someone’s kid letting her or him know I am there for them and try my very best, all the while trying to dodge bullets or not thinking about if the next RPG or IED is going to take me out or not.

Those experiences, and many others, strengthened my personal resolve to overcome bad experiences by placing more importance on happiness. The nightmares still come. I still get sick hearing helicopters or jack hammers, but more important it is the happiness I have.

Dear Matt:

I appreciate your clear and straightforward brief summary of your worldview. I can understand it now and that makes me feel good. I also agree with your summary, your world view.

We are not rational beings, not primarily. We evolved from other animals, and are, as I see it, primarily animals. This means that before rational thinking there were instincts and emotions to guide us, no logic, no language.

Thing is, we are still instinctual and emotional beings, primarily, and so, we cannot emotionally experience anything at all without those chemicals in our brains and elsewhere in our bodies.

anita