Me and my ex best friend Gina had a fall out back in September and haven’t spoken since then. We’ve been best friends for two years. We had a fall out due to her lack of consistency and ditching me for her boyfriend. Not only did I have a fall out with her because of it but so did my other best friend that I introduced Gina to, Adam.

Fast forward, on Halloween night Adam confessed to me how Gina reached out to him to confide in him with a serious matter. She told him she is sick and may have breast cancer. When he told me my gut instinct was to reach out to her but due to our fall out, I have too much pride with her. It sounds harsh but my ex best friend is very prideful. She admitted to Adam how she knows she was wrong and a bad friend to the both of us.

Yesterday, my dad encouraged me to reach out to Gina. And so I did. I simply told her how I am here for her and I hope she is doing okay. She replied back saying she loves me too, she appreciates my concern and she hopes the same for me as well. Apparently, I wasn’t supposed to say anything because she had reached out to Adam asking why he told me. She wanted to keep this private but it hurts not feeling close to her anymore when I did nothing wrong this time. I valued our friendship and the whole two years I just felt like it wasn’t mutual. I am not a prideful person but when I get hurt more than once, I turn into one. Me and her have had two fall outs in the past where we didn’t speak for a month max. One was my fault and I tried to gain the friendship back. But now this fall out has been her fault and she’s been speaking to my friends besides me. I almost feel like I was never good enough as a friend for her to still not reach out to me yet speak to my friends that I’ve introduced her to.

I feel so conflicted because apart of me feels like this situation is serious enough to not let my emotions get the best of me but another part is just so hurt by being left on the back burner. Not only that but it also makes me afraid of my friendship with Adam. I’ve had so many “friends” betray me in the past so it’s been hard to remain friends with someone who is associated with someone else I am no longer friends with.

Am I wrong for feeling this way? I hate to feel attached and territorial with my friends. I have this trauma with getting close to people and trusting in them and Adam has never steered me wrong.

• This topic was modified 6 years ago by Julie.