Hi ajack379

I don’t think you need to go any deeper. You’ve pretty much hit the core. I had similar feelings, and the core untruth for me was “I am not good enough” This was something that was implied during my childhood all the time. I believed it, and, because I did, I kept attracting more of it into my life.

So, I do believe you know what the lie is that you are telling yourself. But now you have to put in the work. You have to undo that belief, and replace it with what you want to believe about yourself.

One way to do this is with affirmations (you may already have done this). From personal experience I can tell you that as you begin, you’ll feel like an idiot trying to tell yourself you are worthy of love, and that you are just as deserving of Love as anybody else. It feels weird to be telling oneself this. HOWEVER, it works. I’ve done this. After a little while it doesn’t feel so stupid. It starts feeling more like the truth. And as you keep going, you confront the lie more and more, and it starts to loosen it’s grip on you, until it fades away. It sounds so simple, but it’s also hard. You have to keep at it. They say that if you do this for at least 21 days that it starts to take hold.

I’m doing the same thing regarding the relationship I had. The problem is I still see this woman almost every day, as we work in the same room in the same company. And I know she still has feelings for me, but she treated me badly (not on purpose, but she has a very hard time expressing feelings, so the way she dealt with me was very confused and heartless). I’ve come to realize that she triggered the shadow of “I’m not good enough. I don’t deserve to be loved” in me. So now I’m doing affirmations to eradicate this lie. It’s hard work, but I need to do this, otherwise I will keep falling into the same patterns with other relationships.

Cheers
Gunter