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I rejected a girl and I like her now

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  • #80725
    Hi
    Participant

    Have been classmates with this girl for 2 years but this year we are in different classes. At the start of the year, she kept messaging me and we talked about stuff which included heart shape emojis, her telling me to say that she’s sweet, etc. I think that at one point she asked me something about being together, but I wasn’t quite sure. She even once said that I was cute. I didn’t know what to say so I kinda ignored her? I mean I don’t get comments like this everyday. Girls are kinda unpredictable… I may kind of had rejected her and ever since then, we drew further and further apart. 5 months later, she doesn’t talk to me anymore. She don’t even say hi when we see each other like she used to. I feel that she is going out of her way to not see me as much as possible.. She don’t even look at me when we walk past each other…
    After reading the messages we sent each other now, I realised that she actually liked me. I couldn’t believe it. I rejected her just like that because I didn’t want a girlfriend as I had 1 before and it was just a bad experience.
    And she is quite pretty and popular in the previous school we were in before so it was no surprise boys from our current school liked her.
    I realised now that I liked her a lot but I already rejected her, plus she had many other boys to choose from, so it would be kinda embarrassing. Please help.

    #80726
    Laura
    Participant

    From what you’ve said, yes, she would definitely feel rejected! Especially if she was really interested in you, which it sounds like she surely was. The only way for you win her back is to do something very direct and clear that you are now interested. You should tell her that you weren’t interested before because you were still hurt by the previous relationship, but that now you are available to be with her — IF she is available as well! You may have missed your chance. You will find that timing is a crucial factor in relationships.

    #80883
    Ann
    Participant

    Well…for starters, if she will give you the time now, I would apologize fully and wholeheartedly for having hurt her by your behavior. Let her know that YOU don’t think it was okay that you treated her dismissively (ignored her). Only do this if you really think this – regardless of if she accepts your apology or not. Let her know that you did and do like her.Certainly offer her an explanation for your behavior if she is open to hearing it. It doesn’t excuse your behavior but can help in taking the sting away from her as well as helping her understand that you didn’t mean to hurt her but that you were confused and trying to deal with a bad experience at the time. Nobody is perfect and we all do things we wish we hadn’t, but you can always try and do better. Holding yourself accountable and showing respect and caring is a good thing for all concerned…whether you get the girl or not.

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