Dear sara:

I hope I didn’t turn you away by asking questions. I wanted to understand your situation better, this is why I asked.

Your mother’s behavior reads unreasonable, from what you shared. I wish it was different for you. If you would like to share more about your situation, please do. Perhaps other members will respond as well, offering you something that may be helpful to you.

* I will be away from the computer and back in about 15 hours.

anita

Dear sara:

Your life is very difficult, like a prisoner. It shouldn’t be that way, but as you know, it is the way it is. My suggestions:

If you didn’t do so already, talk to your father about him talking to your mother regarding having some social life.

Talk to your mother in a different way than before. “We fight every other day… She doesn’t like to be wrong and she sticks by her answer”-

do not try to tell her that she is wrong- all that does is makes her angrier and more stubborn. Don’t argue with her and do not fight. Every time you argue and fight with her, you make things worse for yourself.

Do not try to befriend her either. That might make her suspicious of you.

Instead: let her know that she has the power over you and that you accept it.

Then let her know that you would like a limited social life and suggest to her to put together a contract where the behaviors she does not want you to do are specified, the behaviors she is okay with are specified, and the consequences are specified as well. Offer to sign such a contract.

What do you think?

anita