I feel so used, please help.

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This topic has 4 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 10 years, 3 months ago by Matt.

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August 19, 2014 at 8:50 pm #63674

Summer
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I had a friend who I considered a best friend for a few years. We were close and shared a lot of personal things with each other. My friend was supportive when I was upset and tried to cheer me up at times. However, as time went on, I noticed my friend had starting lying to me about things. I was ditched by my friend and a few other people one night a few months ago. I had loaned my friend money and they never paid me back, always making excuses. Recently, I found out my friend lied to me again and had used my family’s money for their own expenses. I had also found out my friend had taken some of my stuff. Anyways, my friend stopped responding to me and left and now I don’t know what to do. They refuse to meet with me and fix things. What should I do?

August 19, 2014 at 10:50 pm #63687

Jane Kearney
Participant

I am sorry to hear that you had such an experience dealt to you by someone you trusted. My life philosophy is that there are no mistakes in life and that you entered into this friendship for a life lesson that has maybe not been revealed to you yet. From my worst experiences have come the best changes in my life, so don’t despair. If the financial loss is considerable, then I would suggest filing suit against the person or having an attorney send them a demand letter for monies owed you. I don’t know of any of us ever get to skip the lesson of being burned by someone. All I can say is Ouch!

MissJane

August 20, 2014 at 5:11 am #63696

Anonymous
Participant

In your meditation ask yourself if you can accept the situation for how it is. If you feel you cannot, center yourself in the moment and ask yourself if you are willing to accept the situation for what it is, at this moment. Pain is sometimes mandatory, but suffering is optional.

For peace and serenity we will want to forgive others who have wronged us. For example I may be motivated to help but there are some people that I don’t loan money to because everyone knows they have lied and cheated people in the past. They are suffering so I forgive them (and don’t loan them any more money).

August 21, 2014 at 3:18 am #63749
Will
Participant
I think your friend, and the money, are both gone. Ouch indeed.

The only choices you have are to stew on it or to let it go. I don’t think there’s anything you need to do. Forget em and move on.
- This reply was modified 10 years, 3 months ago by Will.
August 21, 2014 at 5:03 am #63754

Matt
Participant

Summer,

There’s a saying “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” Why are you trying to fix the relationship? Doesn’t it seem like your “friend” isn’t a very good friend? Ignoring boundaries, stealing, conniving? That’s not very friendly…

With warmth,
Matt
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