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I feel alone.

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  • #44831
    Ximena
    Participant

    I’m a junior in high school and I know I should probably be having the greatest time of my life right now, but I feel so alone. I have an extremely supportive family and my mom is always there for me. I recently lost my two best friends. I was friends with them ever since I was in 3rd grade and they just kind of left me like I was worth nothing. I also used to have a guy best friend, but he started to have feelings for me and pushed me away when I told him I didn’t have those same feelings. I have another best friend but she isn’t very emotional with me. I have a boyfriend that lives a good two plane rides away, but we’ve been going out for about a year and a half now. I am really happy with him and I trust him completely. You could say I have other good friends that I am getting closer with. I really like to talk to people and meet people. I used to be very introverted, but I have become a lot more extroverted. I love having a busy schedule. In my friend group I’m usually the one that invites and proposes we do things. I also love helping people and I am that person that is always there. This is a brief overview of my life.

    I am so blessed for all the people in my life. I know I am a very fortunate person, yet I am at a point where I feel so alone and invisible. I feel like I don’t mean anything to most people. I don’t get any emotional support from any of my friends and I feel like I’m going to explode. I want to be cared for like I have cared for people in the past. Most of them haven’t cared about my feelings. Because of my past experiences with many of my best friends giving me the back stab I will say that I have closed myself up. I have realized that that just means I become alone and I feel worse about myself and now I just do anything to talk to people. Now I feel like I try so hard to be this person that people care for and like, but nobody does. I’m that nice girl that ends up alone and sad. I want to have people that miss me when I go off to college. I don’t want to look back on all of high school with resentment and think “Wow I really was worth nothing”. I don’t like being unnoticed.

    I just kind of wanted to write down what I feel. I want to share with someone. Thank you for listening… 🙂

    #44878
    shannon
    Participant

    I know how you feel, at times I believe we all feel alone. But reading what you wrote made me understand how we feel isn’t always what we have. You ‘have other good friends’ and I think you and I both, need to learn to trust, yes people may have tossed you aside, but not everyone is like that. I think that when we feel alone, but we know we have a network of people we love, the only person we feel isn’t there for us is, well us. We need to love ourselves, which is (I know) easier said than done. But keep trying!

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