I live in another country to my family, about 6 hours flight. I normally see them every year, Im also the one who does all the contacting, keeping in touch and sending flowers for birthdays etc… My parents are separated (my brother, sister and myself are not close) and getting on in years; 80’s and early 90’s. I work hard all year and save as much as I can to go home to visit, but last year I decided not to and flew to Asia to see my daughter, had a great time. Anyway, this year I told myself I have to go home for that visit. Once again worked hard, saved hard and was planning the trip and I find out that most of my family will be going away doing their own thing for the xmas break and those who were staying around, didnt offer to put me up. I felt really hurt and changed my plans and said I would come over when everyone was back (about 6 weeks). I havent booked my flight but the time has come and I just dont want to go home, nobody has offered me a bed (except a couple of close friends) and I will have to go to 3 to 4 different places in the country to visit everyone, hire a care and by the sounds of it pay for accommodation. Why TF would I go, it just feels awful. I feel like I want to spend my hard earned dollars on something more exciting. I would feel bad if I didnt visit and my Mum & Dad doesnt last much longer and I also I keep telling my girlfriends that I will come over.

What am I asking…well, am I justified in not going and feeling the way I do? My family arent horrible people but they are not overly social and stress at the smallest thing. My Dad cant put me up because he’s in a retirement village with no room, Everyone else has room. Oh and my friends over here (where I live) keep saying you have to go home, stop putting it off.