If I could withdraw from ALL family, I would. I can’t handle the expectations. I’m not good enough – not a good enough mom, daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece, cousin. I want to be….but I don’t want to. I despise myself for not wanting to be involved, not wanting to visit, not making them my top priority.
I am sorry for your pain Alyce.
It can be hard being around people especially family with expectations.
I have learned to shield myself from those around me who do that and go inward to give myself compassion that I’m OK just the way I am.
It does take practice and a strong, consistent resolve.
And sometimes you do need a time out from those people.
So I invite you not to despise yourself. Love yourself. You are a good enough You.
It can be hard doing that when you are bombarded by those people who share your DNA that you are not good enough.
And what do you have to lose if you do love yourself and ignore them?
Thank you, Mark. I appreciate your kind words. I spent the day thinking about being good enough right now and loving myself. It’s definitely where I need to start. I’m going to do it. Thank you again.