Hi hannahleah,

If you are unhappy with your life, you will have to give up some element of it at some point so you can move forward. Divorce is always a challenge, which is why so many married couples stay together even if their marriage is unfulfilling or unhealthy. Instead of following the voice inside their heads encouraging them to leave, some people simply come up with excuses to stay. Instead of being one of these people, learn how to leave a marriage as well as how to tell if you really should leave.

Before actually leaving your marriage, you need to figure out whether you should. There are a few sure signs that you need to at least seriously consider either counseling or leaving your spouse.

If there is no longer mutual respect between you, your marriage’s foundations is gone and it will be incredibly hard to fix. This is actually the most common reason for divorce and can cause the follow issues.
Those who are in an unhealthy relationship should look into leaving. An unhealthy relationship includes a marriage where one person is excessively possessive or controlling. Healthy marriages that work will involve each spouse supporting the other, including their desire to have their own life, friends, and interests without feelings of guilt.

If someone in the relationship has previously been physically abusive and not received professional help, then there is no guarantee they will not repeat their actions. This is an unsafe relationship and indicates you should leave. Abusiveness is really the time to start thinking about how to leave a marriage.
Consider leaving your marriage if you or your spouse won’t take responsibility for their actions, instead finding fault with those around them.

If one of the people in the marriage is uncomfortable or fearful about speaking their mind, this is a sign that the spouse only cares about themselves and the marriage is near its end.
Spouses who are consistently critical, argumentative, moody, nasty, or degrading are emotionally abusive. This is not a healthy relationship and can lead to the destruction of self-esteem by feeding doubt, insecurity, and fear.

If you find yourself constantly thinking about the needs of other people instead of yours, you should consider leaving the marriage instead. In other words, if you spend too much time helping others, you may be trying to ignore how you feel about your relationship and should take some time to think about your feelings.

A good sign that you should look into how to leave a marriage is if you find yourself frequently fantasizing about leaving your spouse and living a happy life. If you daydream about not having to live with them, you are already on the way out of the marriage emotionally.

After considering the above signs, take some time to think about what would happen if you and your spouse actually split up. This will take a while since you need to consider all of the consequences that affect your world, including religious affiliations, family, friends, children, work, living arrangements, emotions, and finances. If you are the primary breadwinner in the family, take time to research your state’s laws so you know what you will be responsible for financially in relation to your children or spouse. Instead of just thinking about these things, actually write them down so you can visually see how your life will change.

xoxo

Laura