Hi Anita,

Sounds reasonable & the way he is so unpredictable & impossible to communicate with I am really seeing how immature & irresponsible he is and was…He only thinks about what is right in front of him at the moment, not long term…almost like a teenager.

He never responded when I sent him an e-mail telling him to make arrangements to pick up his things.  When he gets mad is when he gets things done, so I guess he figures he will ignore me so he won’t have to pick them up.

I am getting so fed up with him I can’t hardly stand it.  So childish he is at the moment and actually has been since he moved.  No responsibility & doing whatever works in his best interest.  All I believe he cares about is himself!!!

Bella~

Hi Anita,

You will love this one…I received an email yesterday about him changing  the address which would have sent my bank info & account to his new address which was on my e-mail I  & drove by the house…He is indeed living with her in a 1000 sq. ft 80 yr. old home in a bad part of town about 25 min from where we lived on the lake in a large home w/ golf course & a great part of town…He had a 400 sq. ft. master bedroom and his own newly remodeled  bathroom with a 4 x 8 ft shower that he loved all the privacy we just had done a year ago because he is 6 2′ also with a cal. king bed off the side of the house with a private balcony~

Not trying to brag but when I saw the house I felt so good, because I amagned he was in a similar home because he wanted our new house with more privacy by itself and a 3 car garage.  Where he now is in the middle of a bunch of houses w/no garage & NO privacy!! Also somehow he had a new camper hooked to his truck…So I guess he went on a purchase binge…

I also found out when w spoke briefly yesterday I asked him why he cheated and he said he didn’t,  that he only communicated with this girl months before he left and then he moved in with her only after 2 weeks which she can’t be much to do such a thing.  I hope once he stops the weekend summer trips and outings and the honeymoon is over, because it will … he is miserable!

He always told me he wanted to live out away from everything and be alone, that is why I purchased the property for us to build on last year which he still said he wanted me to GIVE it to him for 1/3 of what I paid so he could BUILD HER a house…

Also I found out she is 14 yrs. younger that I am (IT bothered me a lot) & (I don’t know what she looks like, just a lot younger),  I guess he now has a new young girl…

I feel he is angry as you said about the house deal going through & his moving into the tiny house with a girl he barley knew, you  know as well as I do, you can’t know someone for 2 weeks and make a transition like that & the relationship having much of a chance to amount to much.

One thing, he was still very hateful yesterday for no reason when we spoke and didn’t seem like the man I knew and I told him so…I told him the kind man I met years ago was gone…

Everyone that knows the situation said he probably left because of what you mentioned.  Me changing and messing up his plans.  I did basically take such good care of him, making sure he always had nice dress clothes for work and usually whatever he needed I would make sure I got him on Birthdays and Christmas…I didn’t just buy him things, it was always a holiday…I was good to him & he always told me he felt good about it because in his other relationship his money was spent on wife and kids…

Bella~

Hi Anita,

What will I do if he would come knocking?

I still hurt over the way he treated me & the terrible summer I have lived, but in just the past few days I am having feelings of resentment & I don’t cry over him anymore (no panic attacks), that really scared me & I will NEVER forget how scared I was when that happened…I still have fleeting thoughts on occasion, but am able to handle them before they get out of control.  More of the thoughts I am having are of how hateful he has been and no respect to treat me as I should have been.

If these feelings continue, which I feel they will~ I am on the road to healing from this terrible chapter in my life.  This has been a very rough 3 1/2 months…But I survived! with your help & thank you for that~

Answer to the question…I would never let him move back with me and would be so happy to let him see I have moved on…I could never trust him again, will never forget the pain he has caused  &  have seen a side of him that I never knew existed.  So sad, but so true.

I do have a question for you, he has not responded about his pictures (Nothing), I did send him an email letting him know to forward a list of what was here (nothing), also he has a key to a building I have and I asked him Sun. to mail it to me because I was hiring someone to move my things out (I am going to sell the property it is on) & I couldn’t get in without the key.  I asked him to send a quick text confirming it was sent so I could schedule the man to move my things.  He has not been curtious enough to say yes, or no…Which I don’t think he is going to send it.  Why do you think?  I am really getting so angry at his being so immature, absolutely no reason for him not to answer, send the key or get his pics!!!

Bella~

I agree 100%…

I already had a lock installed over the door so he can’t get in the building…I thought since his key was small he could send it in the mail with no problem.  Why is he being so mean?  It is so immature.  Why try make my life so difficult?

I received a call back just an hr ago from a retired handy man that is going to help when I need things done & I have another on reserve, so I feel much better in case I need help so I don’t feel desperate…I think that was causing a lot of my anxiety since my ex took care of all those things for years.

Do you actually still think after knowing his situation with his new girl & new living condition is why he is still being hateful &  that he is unhappy?

Bella~

Thank you Anita,

I just sent him an email stating what you said about a week to pick up his things…

I will keep you updated & have a Beautiful Day my Friend!

Bella~

Hi Anita,

He was suppose to send the key to the building & let me know when he could pick up his pictures & of course, nothing…

I am not going to worry about it or ask him again.  I don’t know why he likes to use the fact he is to busy to call/text or give me a time for anything since he moved…But he has time to text & call her 50 times a day and take days off for trips!!  Geeezzz, I wasn’t going to do that, but it just came out…I do feel better.  LOL

I am finished with his childish games, or maybe my few needs during the last 4 mos.  have been at the bottom of the Totem Pole…In some small way I was hoping before I made the final decision he is scum of the earth, that he would make a break through and possibly do or say something nice.  Oh well, so much for miracles…

I hope you have a wonderful weekend Anita & I will update if anything happens exciting for me over the weekend!!

Bella~

Hi Anita,

I don’t know how private you must be, but I am curious…Where do you live (the State)…I would like to hear about your life also, but I am sure that is unexceptable considering the circumstances.

Bella~