Home→Forums→Tough Times→How to deal with sadness
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Anonymous.
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September 25, 2017 at 9:14 am #170165
RLRParticipantI think maybe I am just an unhappy person by nature. Since the first of this year, I’ve just had one set-back after another and it never seems to end. I’ve tried the LOA, but it is not helping. I have issues going on in my life and I’ve spoken to NO ONE about this, not even family members.
The one major issue…and I can’t believe I’m speaking about it as this is very difficult for me … on January 1st, I found out my husband is bisexual and has been for quite some time. This was a heavy blow to me! We are trying to work through it and there have been things that have happened that I am not ready to talk about, but now I am thinking I do not want to be married anymore. Then I almost lost my brother-in-law, my 22 year old cat died, a good friend committed suicide, two friends have cancer, our business is on the brink, struggling to get a new business up and running. I feel like such a failure. I don’t know how to be happy anymore. I know there are so many others worse off then me and I feel guilty feeling like this.
Thank you for listening!
September 25, 2017 at 10:01 am #170183
AnonymousGuestDear RLR:
You wrote that you “feel like such a failure”- this belief, that you are a failure adds to this sadness you experience, and it is not a belief you were born with, and so, I don’t believe it is “by nature”. Any person believing this would feel sad and distressed.
The fact that your husband is bisexual is not a failure on your part, not your doing or undoing, nothing to do with you, as far as I understand the issue. Neither is your cat’s death at 22, nor your friends’ illnesses.
And it is not a failure on your part that the LOA didn’t work for you- it is of a very limited use, this law. It works in limited circumstances, limited contexts. For example if you are in a party and you smile and act happy, then you will attract people: people will be motivated to socialize with you. On the other hand, the LOA will not turn your husband to a strictly heterosexual man, nor could it cure your friends or prolong your cat’s life, and so forth.
I hope you post again with more of your thoughts and feelings.
anita
September 25, 2017 at 10:32 am #170189
PeterParticipantFeeling Bad for Bad, feeling guilty for feeling guilty… I get it and it a lousy loop to get stuck in.
The first step is stop. Stop by noticing that feeling bad abut feeling bad, guilty for feeling bad can only dig the hole deeper.
Your feelings are valid. You matter, Your feelings matter. You don’t have to apologize for how you feel. Feelings are information that can help you respond to a situation vice react to it. You don’t have to wield your feelings like a sword, you hurt me so I will hurt you… but can use them to understand who you are and what you need.
You have had a lot of shocks to the system and it is reasonable for you to ask for and take time to sort though them. A professional could really help. There is no shame in asking for help.
I wish you all the best
The Law of Attraction requires authenticity, to they own self be true, so if your unhappy, your unhappy… add to that the difficulty in knowing our authentic selves. Its to easy to fall down the rabbit hole with the philosophy of LOA so would not spend much time thinking about it. Just be you, as best as you can be.
September 25, 2017 at 11:25 am #170223RLRParticipantThank you for your reply. I am truly at a loss and don’t know what to do or what direction I need to go in at this point. I’m in a situation that I do not know how to get out of. How does one start over at 57?
September 25, 2017 at 11:39 am #170233AnonymousGuestDear RLR:
You start from the beginning every day. This is the way of nature, plants, animals.. they all start anew, from the beginning, every day. There is no guidebook that I believe in regarding what you are supposed to have achieved by this age or that age.
anita
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