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Help-I just ended something, did I do the right thing?

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Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)
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  • October 27, 2018 at 8:52 am #233693
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Lovesong:

    Notice that this “most intense and passionate relationship”, a “very powerful bond due to hormones and the development of the brain” did not lead to you being interested in him over the years (“He has contacted me 2 other times throughout the years.. but I was never interested“).

    You asked if you made the right decision. I think it wasn’t the wrong decision: you felt anxious and you put an end to the situation that was causing you anxiety. There are no children involved, no marriage to dissolve. He lives where he does, you live separately. There were no mutual plans to make a life together.

    So I would say, you didn’t make the wrong choice.

    anita

     

    October 27, 2018 at 8:53 am #233695
    Feathering my nest
    Participant

    None of us can tell you if it is the right choice to make but we can talk it over with you, to help you understand better.

     

    To me, it sounds as if;

    -you are not happy to be friends-with-benefits or have an casual relationship status

    -he is not ready for a relationship, but is attracted to you

    -your anxieties overwhelm you

     

    Xx

    October 27, 2018 at 9:03 am #233697
    Lovesong
    Participant

    Anita:

    Thank you, you are correct.   There were no complications and I did put an end to a situation that was causing me anxiety.   Now I most face the grieving process and the loss of “what might have been”.

     

    Feathering my nest:
    You are correct, I believe, on all 3 points.   Didn’t know if I should attempt to “wait it out” until/if he is ready for a relationship.

    Thank you for your input.

     

    October 27, 2018 at 9:27 am #233701
    Lovesong
    Participant

    Dear Anita,

    This is a very interesting observation,:

    Notice that this “most intense and passionate relationship”, a “very powerful bond due to hormones and the development of the brain” did not lead to you being interested in him over the years (“He has contacted me 2 other times throughout the years.. but I was never interested“).

    I don’t know what to make of it, yet, I am still processing, but I appreciate it.

    I am grieving today, but I will get through it.

    Thanks again

    October 27, 2018 at 9:28 am #233703
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Lovesong:

    You are welcome.

    The plan to “wait it out”, waiting for “what might have been.. if he is ready for a relationship” is where lots of women stay stuck waiting for so long that … we forget what it is we are waiting for.

    Share here anytime your grief about what-might-have-been, what you would have liked it to be.

    anita

    October 27, 2018 at 10:12 am #233717
    Feathering my nest
    Participant

    Nah don’t wait.

    If it is meant to be, it will come to be. xx

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