I am the type of person who doesn’t poke the bear.

I don’t think he would do anything… But I also don’t put anything past anyone.

So in regards to just leaving I honestly feel like when we get into the late 20’s in the day of month. He would probably say something. If I just said I was leaving…I don’t know if that would provoke some crazy conflict between us.

It isn’t that I necessarily need to be cordial after all this. I just at this point want to avoid confrontations if possible. He doesn’t work set hours so he can come in at any moment. He will see me packing days leading up to.

So I feel its best to just tell him and pick his brain about it.

If he doesn’t like it…it doesn’t really matter.

It may not even be a whole conversation I may just say that “The leasing lady emailed about what day we want to leave. I am leaving the 31st so do you need to stay for the rest of the April part so I cant let her know she keeps asking?”

I am feeling a little anxious about it.

But hopefully it will just be simple and I’m over thinking it.

It will just be relief really, ya know.

I truthfully do not know how he feels. I am really at a loss about it.

Me? I am visibly bothered by the situation; as someone should….Him I don’t know.

A part of me thinks he feels this is a competition or a  joke or something. The idea that I am not reaching out to him may be what he interprets as a challenge. Like “Oh shes not even going to act like she wants to talk about what happened (She usually does) she broke up with me so she should take action or show me she cares” something to that effect.

Maybe he wants me to make him feel invited in, to give him a opening. (He has said that before, thats how he would want me to address him in times of conflict. I.E. Figuratively leave the door open so to speak, I dont know how much that makes sense)  To go in blindly not knowing if I will reject him probably deters him too. But if I was showing a little more attachment I dont know if that would make a difference or not…doesn’t really matter to me tho.

If I don’t mean enough to him for him to even risk getting his feelings hurt by me saying no. OR he could see it like he will lose the power if he submits to me. Like if he wants to continue he would have to inquire about what I need for him to come back. He would put himself in the position to inevitably have to acknowledge the things he needs to change drastically.

Or as well (I have to keep in mind) he literally could just not care. Maybe he had enough too. But to me, that version of him would be a little less concerned with me OVERALL if that was the case.

Stubborn people have the weirdest way they logic things in their mind. My best friend does stuff like he does to her BF and to hear her say the other sided version (I never get) of someones significant other who purposely does things that distress their partner is purely crap they just logic in their head by “They can do what they want” “They have least to lose” People like this love to say they dont need anybody, they can do with out without you, they like to have you around but dont care really either. She describes it to me like she does it just because she can. Ex.) Her BF called her all day asking her one time if she wanted to go out of town with him & she was irritated with him (or at least trying to convince herself of the reason she was). She wouldn’t answer the phone and when he text her she just said no over and over. But shes on the phone with me literally telling me she is going to come and he better call her right before he leaves so she can change her mind. I am like “why dont you just tell him?” She says “because I am stubborn and I like the chasing/begging stuff idk”. He ended up leaving without calling her one last time smh. She literally called me mad like “He should have called again”  I was like dude your crazy. she was thinking about having him turn around and come back to get her….

So that was a random story but it just a pin on my insight in the the lack of compassion they feel when they are trying to prove some point or make themselves feel good at your expense.

• This reply was modified 6 years, 9 months ago by Jenny Lynn.

Gosh that last sentence hit me….I keep re reading it.

He chooses anger over me EVERY TIME…:(