Hi Tera.

In my opinion, it’s possible to pick up with someone after you’ve been rejected by them but then they want you again, only if you BELIEVE he has changed and that there’s mutual interest in there.

But you said it yourself that you have absolutely no interest and that he’s more of a chore than anything, so moving on and starting fresh would be a much better idea for your situation. You deserve someone who knows they want you the first time around, not after he has test the waters elsewhere to find out you were the right choice.

Is it possible? Sure. Is it likely? I don’t know. I think the fact that you feel its a chore and have little interest is your answer.

When I was first starting to go through my separation and divorce, I had an old girlfriend contact me and I was tempted to try and get back with her because I was feeling so alone. But a friend said something that really struck me- she was an EX girlfriend for a reason. Someone popping into your life after a year with no explanation and wanting to immediately get into a relationship again sounds… convenient. My best guess would be the girl he was cheating on you with (and yes- reading what happened, I do think thats the case) left him and now he’s thinking of you as his fallback option. You deserve far better than that.

In my own opinion and unfortunate experience, rejection is extremely painful. When your partner leaves you for another, which only lasts for a period of time and then they want to return to you. She would cry alligator tears and my desire for her would be stronger than good sense would allow for and once again I would take her back. These boomerang relationships take your emotions on a rollercoaster ride and it will kill your self worth over a long season. Almost like a wound that will not heal completely, she would rip my heart apart each and every time I took her back.

Physical and verbal abuse if given any reason to repeat itself can destroy you as a person. So many times I tried to rationalize why this was happening, was it my fault or did I truly deserve this treatment by her. I was allowing her to control me by my own actions, I was an enabler for my own pain and discontent. This fatal but intoxicating relationship kept me blind to what was truly going on inside of me. I was such a fool when it came to her.

Until I gain my own self worth all over again, took a firm position and got rid of her all together, my life was a whirlpool of misery. It was truly hard to make this decision, climb over the wall of totally lust between us both and not allow her to enter back into my life.

Be wise and look beyond the moment at hand.