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He let me go and would like support today pls

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  • December 11, 2014 at 9:07 am #69093
    Jane
    Participant

    My ex of 2 years called it quits last night. I’ve had a miserable night alone trying to calm myself and would love some support today. I need it really bad please. I’ve been feeling a distance from him for some time off and on and I myself was going to ask him if something was up with us and if he wanted to move on. In the back of me mind I wanted him to say no, that’s not what I want and Im sorry your feeling that way and lets work it out. Last night was not the answer nor what I expected of him. He came over to my house with my things in his hands and said he “couldn’t do it anymore”. I stood in shock. I let him know how Ive been feeling but did not want us to break up but he kept saying that he couldn’t love me in the way that I deserve and it would be best to let me go. I’m always felt a “block” or withhold from his love, if he even truly loved me at all like he said. As I analyze the past, somewhere along the way he lost the love and interest he had in me which is a hard pill to swallow but I have to learn to accept. He doesn’t love me or didn’t like the level I had for him. I wanted to marry this man and foreseen much potential and now all that is gone. I feel so lost, numb, and empty right now. Please any support is much appreciated right now. I don’t know where else to go.

    Thank you,
    GK

    December 11, 2014 at 10:13 am #69106
    belove
    Participant

    Dearest GK,
    My heart goes out to you. My marriage of 7 years with 2 young kids ended ~4yrs ago, so I can relate to how you’re feeling right now. Grief needs to take place. You used to be a couple, now you’re one. Certain bond broke, so there’s pain. Please be patient with yourself. Allow yourself to cry as much as you need to. Just know that this emotion will lessen and pass with time. And you will come out a stronger woman. The time alone will allow you some reflection, some understanding, some awareness, some realization, and then peace. A peace that is born after a crisis is priceless. You’ll still remember everything, but in a very different light. You’ll somehow feel a sense of gratitude that things happened just the way it did. Sometimes, some door closes because we are meant to walk through another – often a more rewarding one. It will be okay. People enter our life to teach us something about ourselves. Take time to learn what that is that this relationship gave you. Take time to learn who you really are and what really brings you joy. You have the time to try out new hobbies. Or just take walks – as many as you can. It will clear your head. Many insights usually come to me in a walk. My love and hugs to you.

    • This reply was modified 10 years, 3 months ago by tinybuddha.
    December 11, 2014 at 10:18 am #69107
    jdkm
    Participant

    Hi GK!

    I cannot write much more than Belove did, because she explained things very well.

    I too have been through a very painful break-up, almost a year ago now. I think the most important advice I got back then is that it will hurt – you cannot heal without feeling the pain. But, please try to remember that this pain is temporary – and a year on (and after a lot of time spent believing with all my heart that I will never get better), I am happier and I am truly starting to move on – so this too shall pass. Embrace the pain and learn all you can from it – and eventually it will start hurting less and less – i promise!

    Reach out whenever you need to! You are not alone.
    JDKM

    December 11, 2014 at 11:41 am #69114
    Jane
    Participant

    Thanks Belove..I very much appreciate the reply. Sorry to hear about your marriage. I can’t imagine having to deal with emotions of a marriage and children. Hearing your strength uplifts me. I know I have to go through the emotions and let them subside as time goes on, ive been through a breakup from my previous 8 yr relationship. Its hard but things in your mind work themselves out. What hurts most is the fact that he didn’t love me fully to the level that I did and it faded to this. I understand that but ACCECPTING is where the block is for me and it hurts. I much anxiety right now. Thanks again for your support!

    December 11, 2014 at 11:45 am #69115
    Jane
    Participant

    jdkm, thank you. Im happy that your pain has lessened. Yes, feeling the pain and riding with it is the best thing I can do in order to move on. Usually I meditate daily however, I’m not in the mood when I know its the best thing I can do right now. I find solace in knowing I can reach out, thank you <3

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