Hi
I’m a 34 year old single woman who had been through some dysfunctional relationships- wherein I was cheated on by ex-bfs and was in a very bad emotionally abusive relationship with one of my extended family member who knew my vulnerability and took advantage of it. Its been only 2-3 years that I’m out of it.
Since childhood I had a very low self esteem. I never felt beautiful nor was I exceptionally good anywhere. I was just am average kid in school and college. I know I’m fine with it but the expectations of folks and family led me to a very depressive state and I made some very wrong choices in life.
At this age, I’m back to school to work on my graduation. Apparently I’m one of the oldest in the college. But due to my size(5′-0″ and thin), I don’t look my age. I easily pass off as a high school kid. The students who know my age treats me with respect(I’m a decade older than most of them) and sort of cuts me away from their friendship circle. Wherever I go in the campus, I’m looked at as if I’m a misfit.
Very recently I have noticed that couple of guys from other departments has started to notice me and has started following me on social networking site and all.
Now, I have a hard time believing that someone can ‘like’ me. and I keep thinking that they doesn’t know that I’m older or they are just around may be for fun etc etc. I know it is not fair on them because I haven’t really asked their intentions and I’m thinking from what I had been through earlier.
This is the time when I should be feeling happy, but my mind is asking me to re-check. What I’m worried about is I don’t want to decline myself of any little happiness because of my past experiences. Any suggestions? Thanks in advance.