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March 7, 2020 at 8:30 am #342024
AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
I hope you make the gym a habit and that you give mindfulness guided meditations a few more tries.
Feb 9, you wrote: “I made a call a few weeks ago in order to get a therapy”- what happened to that plan, to see a psychotherapist???
In regard to how you feel regarding the band: “I felt very distant from everyone around the table. Disconnected.. want to quit… (others).. are becoming the center of all attention.. no one cares to listen to me.. I’m not indispensable.. I really feel left out”-
– this is probably how you felt growing up a whole lot of the time. When we have sad, lonely, left out childhoods, we keep re-experiencing the same-old-same-old emotional and social experience in adulthood. This will be something to look at in therapy. If you want to, you can write about it here. (If you want to, you can choose to not write about it here).
anita
March 19, 2020 at 11:30 am #344154
DanielParticipantDear anita
I hope you’re fine.
Indeed I made a call in order to get a therapy. But I’m not the only one to ask and it takes several months to get an appointment.
Anyway, the world is a mess. I hoop you’re fine. You and every one else.
Daniel
March 19, 2020 at 12:09 pm #344166AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
Thank you for your concern. I hope you are doing okay too, under the circumstances. I wonder what your thoughts are regarding the pandemic from the point of view of a medical student.
I read that in France the total number of Corona virus cases is 9,134 and total deaths 264, at this point. What is happening there as far as people’s state of mind???
anita
March 19, 2020 at 1:59 pm #344186DanielParticipantDear anita
I keep going to the hospital and I’m glad to help the doctors. But I’m getting more and more afraid of the pandemic. I think the worst is yet to come and I’m very concerned about the future. Now the situation seems to be under control but for how long? I’ve been in contact with patients with the virus and I’m probably going to catch it (I may have it already). I don’t want to infect my family, I’m more concerned about them than about me. People keep going out even though it’s forbidden (more or less actually). The virus keeps speading, infecting and killing people. I really want this to end and getting back to normal.
How are things in the US?
Daniel
March 19, 2020 at 2:24 pm #344190AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
You are a courageous man to be helping doctors in a hospital, you are one of the people I refer to as Pandemic Heroes!
“Now the situation seems to be under control but for how long?”- I think it will get better, and in a few months the current health scare will be over, as long as social distancing does continue and people are socially responsible. We all have to be very cautious.
You may have Coronavirus, and I may have it too, because I’ve been in contact with a person who had contact with lots of students until a few days ago. Can you get tested soon, being you work in a hospital? In the meantime, do keep social distancing with your family members, make that happen. And remember, lots of people who tested positive, who are not elderly and who do not suffer from pre-existing conditions, did not become severely ill.
In the US, everything is closed, first time in my life, except for national parks that are open and you can go there with no charge, if I understand correctly, because big parks are not overcrowded and there is plenty of distance between people, way beyond the recommended.
“I really want this to end and getting back to normal”- remember that normal wasn’t that great. Better get to a new normal, better mental well being than you had before. Post here anytime, type away your distress right here, and you will see, this pandemic will be over.
I am so impressed with you, Pandemic Hero!
anita
March 22, 2020 at 4:06 am #344568DanielParticipantDear anita,
Thank you for your words, that means a lot 🙂
This week, I was very exhausted because of lack of sleep and going to the hospital. I felt like crying in the evening. But I’ve rested and feel better now. I’m ready for that new week coming.
I can’t get tested as long as I don’t have symptoms like fever, dyspnea, cough… I hope that you’re going to be alright.
I feel a bit lonely because some people I care about don’t try to get some news from me. It’s tiring to be the one making contact.
Hopefully, you’re right about the future of the pandemic.
My exams are on stand by so I play music even more in my free time. Yesterday, I wrote my first guitar solo ! My love for music really keeps me sane and I know that this love is going to last.
Daniel
March 22, 2020 at 8:11 am #344590AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
Thank you for your concern. What keeps me less scared regarding contracting the disease is that last time I checked 95% of patients who tested positive for the coronavirus world wide show mild symptoms. If it was 95% showing severe symptoms, I’d be very scared, I imagine, or more accurately, I don’t imagine, don’t want to.
You are in the frontline of the pandemic, working in a hospital. I do hope you wear all the protective gear you are supposed to wear! And be very, very careful about every move you make!
“some people I care about don’t try to get some news from me”- there are people I care about (in another country) that I don’t want to get news from because it will distress me to ask . If I thought or they thought that there is something I can help them with, then I would ask, or they would contact me.
I keep reading and studying about the pandemic, and I so very much hope (!!!) that it will be over sooner than later! I can’t wait. But of course, I have to wait. Post again anytime, Daniel, and keep yourself as safe as possible, please.
anita
March 31, 2020 at 8:03 am #346384AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
I wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you and hoping you are okay!
anita
April 4, 2020 at 1:45 pm #347110DanielParticipantDear anita,
Thank you for thinking about me. I had a 3 day break this week because I was exhausted and I was a bit sick. No fever and no cough though so I guess it wasn’t the coronavirus. These 3 days were strange. At first, I slept a lot. Then I realized that it’s been a while since I have thought about my health. Actually, I’m always anxious these days. At home and at work. Loneliness is almost always here as well. I cried today because the weekend is the worst.
Once again, I want to leave my parents and live on my own. But it’s expensive and they don’t really want me to live by myself because they think that I would struggle with my feelings and everything it takes to live alone.
Music helps me to carry on.
Daniel
April 4, 2020 at 1:59 pm #347114AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
Good to read from you!
“The weekend is the worst”- I remember feeling this way, seeing couples walking on the streets, hand in hand, going to the movies on their dates, and I was alone, that loneliness stung badly, and jealousy too, I wanted to be one of those other people living a life I didn’t have. I am not lonely anymore, and weekends, now that the pandemic and shut down is ongoing, doesn’t feel any different from weekdays.
I do hope though that soon enough, you will be one of the couples out there, walking hand in hand with a young woman, going to the movies or whatnot.
Maybe you felt sick because you were exhausted and anxious, working hard and these strange times. What kind of music do you like to listen to?
anita
April 5, 2020 at 1:09 pm #347760DanielParticipantDear anita,
“I am not lonely anymore” what happened ? how did you stop feeling lonely like you used to do?
Yeah, hopefully it will happen someday.
I listen to a lot of different genres. Mostly rock though as it is my first love. These days I like to listen to a lot of classic rock (Pink Floyd, Beatles, Beach Boys), funk (Vulfpeck) and indie rock/pop (Rex orange county, Mac demarco, Tom Misch).
It’s always nice hearing from you.
Daniel
April 5, 2020 at 2:06 pm #347776AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
Well, one reason I am not lonely is that I am communicating with you (and have communicated with hundreds of members over the last five years, here on these forums). Another reason is that I socialize some, in-person, pre-pandemic, that is. Another reason is that my need to socialize in-person is much lower than it used to be. I am way more selective as to who I want to socialize with, so the prospect is not always attractive, in other words, I prefer to be alone than being in boring or annoying or worse, harmful company.
My goodness! You like the same music I do, as far as classic rock anyway. The other things, I don’t recognize. (but will google these later).
It’s always good to hear (read) from you!!!
anita
April 17, 2020 at 2:08 pm #350110DanielParticipantDear anita,
It’s been a little while ! I hope you’re fine. I understand why you’re not lonely anymore. Actually, I find it hard to communicate a lot on the internet. I mean, I find it much better when I’m talking to someone face to face. And as someone who feels different from a lot of people, I rarely find someone I really want to socialize with as well. My friends are almost exclusively girls and I think it’s because it’s easier to talk to them about anything and especially deep talk.
I keep on going to the hospital 5 days a week. The atmosphere seems to be calmer and less stressful. I realized that the main reason why I have trouble sleeping is anxiety so I plan on getting back to meditation !
You may have googled the few artists I have listed, if so tell me what you think about them ! I finally learnt the guitar solo from Time (Pink Floyd) and am quiet proud of me even though it’s not perfect 🙂
Daniel
April 17, 2020 at 2:40 pm #350118AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
Vulfpeck is an American funk group founded in 2011, five albums, most recent album: Live at Madison Square Garden.
Oh, I wish there would be live performances in New York City again, not that I’ll be there to watch them, but I wish the days of lots of people gathering in one place will come back. But I digress. I wasn’t able to listen to anything, the one video I started watching is one of the players talking. I fast forwarded and he was talking again, so I gave up.
I then googled indie rock/pop and listened to Last words of a shooting star,which I liked.
Good to read from you, and good to read that you do have (female) friends, and that the atmosphere in the hospital where you work is calmer. Regarding meditation to help with anxiety, I know of Mark Williams’ series of mindful meditations, but I bet a French sounding meditation will .. sound so much better. Looking forward to the next time you post, whenever it may be, hoping to read next that you experience times of calm.
anita
April 18, 2020 at 2:47 pm #350370AnonymousGuestDear Daniel:
I am watching/ listening to a YouTube of vulfpeck’s live show in Madison Square Garden, introducing the different players,keyboard guitar, drums, saxophone, the drummer is singing, carpets on the stage, singing “animal spirits”, very animated. Next song, quick rhythm, thousands of people in the audience, clapping hands, cheering- thank you for the experience, Daniel. I hope you are well!
anita
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