Hi everyone,

I’ve been living South of my original hometown (since four months ago) with my dad and his new ‘partner’ and kids. -_-

Since the divorce between my parents, my mum has not been taking things very well. She is very depressed, sad, and angry. She is on medication for her depression. And always tells me the reason she is on that – is basically because of my dad. Constant arguments and yelling became a regular thing at the ‘old family home’ (where my mum still lives and my younger sister). I would constantly get blamed by my sister for moving down to stay with my dad. In her eyes it was a ‘betrayl’. My mum is only just starting to realise why I decided to move down to stay with my dad…

The main reason for my move was the constant negativity, arguments and emotional abuse I witnessed and experienced around my mum and sister. It started really impacting on my self-esteem and made me feel depressed. I didn’t have many options but to move to my dad’s (an hour and a half away).

I can not lie to myself and say that I do feel super comfortable here. Because I do not.

I do not agree with what my dad did. Leaving my mum and moving out of the family home when he ‘conviently’ found another woman. I remember when he told me, it was about three weeks after he moved out of the family home. At that time, I was still trying to find another place to stay besides the family home because of the arguments, yelling and screaming that were happening every single day.

Recently, my mum and my grandma (on my dads side) have expressed to me that they do not think that staying with him and seeing him with ‘her’ and ‘her kids’ is a good thing on my behalf. Yesterday my mum said she worries about me, and she just wants to see my happy in a supportive environment. She feels I can not recieve it living at my dads (and she is not wrong, as I feel my dad has become more selfish). My grandma refused to come to my dads and his ‘partners’ housewarming party with ‘her’ family. My grandma said to me, she still respects my mother and she did not think it was right.

I am feeling – stuck, lost and confused, as to what to do from here.

I do have to go back to university next year (for three years). I currently have a ‘casual’ job in the area I’m living at the moment. But I do not think that what I am earning is enough – so I need to start thinking of applying for another job or expanding my skills.

I am unsure what to do – if I should try to work up my savings enough to rent a place closer to university or just continue living with my dad for now (so I do not have to pay rent for the duration of my studies at university).

I have to say the idea of going back to uni (*I stopped studying my previous degree at university last year) does not quite ‘excite’ me. I do know where I want to be in the end – and that is eventually living in Ireland. I’ve always felt a strong connection to the place and… it is….my dream.

Any positive comments and advice is welcome.

Thank you.

Vic. 🙂