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Fear of losing my Grandma

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  • November 30, 2019 at 3:30 am #325299
    Chris
    Participant

    My grandma raised me, along with my mom.  I am so sorry for your situation.  You are not selfish, but you do need to let her go, and give her permission if you can.  It was so hard for me to tell my grandma that it was ok to go.  She had had a major stroke that took everything but her life.  She was bed bound, unable to speak or eat, and lived for about 4 months following the stroke. Shortly after we told her it was ok, she passed.

    You described your grief as very dark, and I experienced the same thing.  I panicked when I first felt that dark void.  Prior to experiencing grief from the loss of a person in my life, I thought it was simply deep sadness.  You will get through it!  She will be close to you after she passes.  She will.  My suggestion would be to find a good psychic medium, and you will see that she is still right there, just no longer  inhabiting her body.  She will always look out for you and love you, in this life and the next.

    I lost my darling boyfriend to cancer three years ago.  The grief that I felt from that loss was so intense, that I didn’t feel I would survive it.  YOU WILL.   There is a good web site called What’s Your Grief, run by two young widows.  They are wonderful and offer lots of information for you to work with.  I guess the best thing I got there was information on how to have a healthy relationship with someone who has passed.  I was delighted, realizing that I was still in a relationship with him, and I wanted it to be good.

    These words to you come from someone who has some distance from the loss.  I hope I have been helpful.  Please keep reaching out, here and where you are comfortable getting support.  You deserve support and love in everything you do in life.

    Peace,

    Chris

     

     

    November 30, 2019 at 6:08 am #325307
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Lostsul36:

    Your grandma, “She had the warmest big smile. She was the kindest most giving person.. she is the strongest person I have ever known… she would be up waiting for me so we could have a quick gossip and laugh and jokes. If anyone ever tried to bring me down.. she would just give me the best life advice and pick me back up again… She has loved me unconditionally… being a mum figure to me, being my best friend, this jolly full of  life person… I miss her energy, I miss her advice, I miss her big smile, I miss annoying her, I miss her infectious laugh, I miss everything about her”.

    Be that someone to a lost child out there, pass on this legacy that your grandma has passed on to you.

    Like you have been, there are many other children who are “introverted.. who never really fitted in anywhere in life, be it in primary school, high school, you name it.. never really belonged or no one really accepted me for me”- I was one of those children. For me, there was no one like your grandma. You can be this person for someone else, sometime in the future.

    Maybe you can work with children and spot this or that child who is lost and lonely, who has not yet been accepted by anyone for who she is.

    I can’t think of a better way to honor your grandma that to pass on her legacy.

    “I can’t imagine my life without her. My life has no meaning without her. Everything seems irrelevant and lonely and dark. I feel like I am starting to lose myself.. I just don’t know how I will cope with such a big void in my life. She is my whole world. Without her my life has no meaning”-

    – imagine being that person, even if it is partly that person, for someone else. Imagine the meaning you will be giving that child or young person, making her or his life relevant, no  longer lonely and dark, helping her to find herself, filling in her void, being her whole world and meaning, until the person you help is okay on her own.

    This is the end result of your grandma’s work, isn’t it, that you will be okay on your own, living the best life possible for you?

    anita

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