So much of what we perceive as “biblical” isn’t biblical at all, it’s the history we’ve learned as fact from whoever was the dominant church in our lives or households – not that I place much more significance on the bible itself. Still, the word “hell” is only mentioned around 50 times, so few as to make it an afterthought in such a massive book. The church has spent centuries mastering and profiting off of two arts: guilt and fear. It’s no wonder you were unable to eliminate either as a “born-again Christian”. Even if you were to behave as the perfect model of Christian faith, you’d still have the fear of hell biting at your ankles…if for no other reason than the occasional curiosity and doubt that’s a very human characteristic.

As for the abortions, the decisions have already been made, and I think the way you allow those choices to haunt you is hell enough for one lifetime. My point here isn’t to get into a moral debate or judgmental analysis. But from a karmic standpoint, you’ve made your bed and your lying in it. In the same way that someone who over-indulges in food or cigarettes, makes their bed and lives with the consequences of poor health. What’s done can’t be undone, but you can choose a healthier way of living. Contraception might be a good thing to stock-up on, or maybe you need to check into having your tubes tied…if you don’t want kids. I say that only because, after the first, there came a second, which you now have double the worry to contend with. You don’t want a third. And depending on the particular brand of faith in your Christian background, contraception may not have been allowed.

If you’re afraid of hell, then there’s no sense in rushing to get there through some desire to punish yourself via suicide. The Christian faith would never teach you that what those actions were for the best, but maybe they were? Many people have kids that have no business having them, and all too often they birth because of their own fears of hell and church guilt. That doesn’t make them good parents or role model citizens of holiness.

So, let it go with an attitude of changing the behaviors that keep putting you in this predicament. Beating yourself up over it, isn’t doing you any good and it won’t change the past. Might as well move forward a little wiser, and use that wisdom to live happier.

I hope this helps :0)

Hello,
Well it seems as if you have already made a hell for yourself in your mind. I am somewhat of a religious person and consider myself to have an amazing relationship with God, but I too have made so many mistakes in my life , mistakes that religion say will banish you to hell, but that is just the scary side of religion , where they show how mean and frighting God can be. But that isnt the beautiful side of it, if you look deep into your religion you will see how beautiful and forgiving He is, trust me , He has already forgiven you, but you have not forgiven yourself for what you did. We are only human, in my religion they teach us that God has more mercy on us than a mother would have on her newborn child, so I’m sure he has forgiven what you have done. So what you made a couple of mistakes? He’s always waiting for you to return to him with open arms. And they say that He waits and hopes that one day you will return to him . Stop researching and looking for the scary side of the religion , the part that I think a lot of people tend to exaggerate about , this is not how it is suppose to be. And there is no such thing as you are damned to Hell. You are still alive, still breathing , still able to make a change, so He has still given you a chance to change and become a better person and to find your true self. We all make mistakes thats how we learn and grow , it takes a very strong person to be able to change and make themselves better and I believe you have that in you . Try listening to Joel Osteen on youtube , he doesn’t speak of the scary and frighting parts of the religion that fill you up with guilt, he talks about the love of it and how amazing it is. Think of Him as your best friend , thats how I talk to him , every time I pray I feel as if I am calling Him to talk to Him about all the problems I have,thank Him for everything and if I have done anything that would upset Him , I would ask for forgiveness and expect Him to forgive me, because that is a promise He made to us and then I would never repeat what I did again. and I for one can promise you this , He hears you every single time . Just try to start fresh with Him , try listening to more uplifting people, if you can get your hands on ” A pocketful of promises for Women” that would help alot because it is a very beautiful book that makes you feel so loved and cared for from Him
Good luck and I hope I helped , if you have any questions let me know . We are all in this together 🙂

This man, his name was Jesus, perhaps you heard of him? Flaca I am not religious though raised a catholic. From what I understand of this man (not as the Son of God) but as a man he broke bread with sinners and the poor. He said it was easier for the camel to pass through an eye of a needle than for a rich man to go to heaven. I think that is how it is said. But Flaca, heaven is here in us all of us. Namaste means that I recognize the divinity in you. Jesus said God was in every man. He said he kingdom of heaven was near and that is because it is in us. If you are afraid of hell than you are letting hell take over you. Find your divinity and forgive yourself. Not sure the Christian way is the way. Jesus was the way but we have strayed. As we have strayed from all who have been sent to tell us, to save us. So go back to your heart. And ask Flaca to forgive herself and live the way we were meant to be. Maybe you should seek out some eastern philosophy I think they have got it right. All the best to you.