Hi everyone, I’m new to the forum and would love your perspective on my situation.

Background
I’ve been married for six years and have two gorgeous kids who are a handful! My marriage is under massive strain principally because of our financial situation and the demands of parenting. My husband left his job two years ago and has found another job but doesn’t enjoy it at all, the time he took off in between jobs cost us almost all of our savings so we are living month to month. He wants to move on again in the next few weeks and this scares me. I’m now the breadwinner working full time in a job that bores me and I hate it because it keeps me away from my kids and tires me out to the point that when I am home with them I’m grouchy and want everyone to just leave me alone. We don’t have any family nearby to help with raising the kids so we rarely get time out from them together – date night happens maybe twice a year if we are lucky and sex happens about once a month which is not enough for me.
Add to this the fact that I’m about 8kg overweight (I’ve lost 2kg in the last few weeks) and cannot tell you one positive thing about myself. So all in all not a great situation.

Question
I’ve started to notice that I feel more ‘alive’ when spending time with friends. It’s the only time that I get to relax and take my mind off my worries. This is especially true of one friend who is particularly flirty and his compliments boost my self esteem. I get a horrible sinking feeling when heading home because being there reminds me how bad things are. Most importantly I do not want my kids to be affected by any break ups or my mood swings. I want to enjoy the time I spend with them because they are the only thing keeping me going. Am I with the right man or indeed am I in the right life? What the hell can I do about this? It all feels so out of my control.

Thank you in advance for all your thoughts and wisdom
Floella