Kelly,

I am with Lila – it is the preview before your big, awesome, sparkly, amazing movie.

I know you had moments of serendipity and connection and magic but those things, as amazing as they feel, dont do a great deal in keeping a relationship health, strong and sustainable. You already know that. I dont believe in the concept of “the one” or that there is only one love..Pfffft….no such thing. Relationships are here to teach us and you will feel so much better during a relationship when you live without the fear of “OMG, this is it, I have to make it work/keep him here”. Sure we all need to put in great effort but that should never stop us from take care of ourselves and opting out when it is harming us.

You havent missed the movie or the bus or the boat. What is yours, will come around. It might work for a lifetime or a few years…after that, there will be another movie/bus/boat for you. Each time, you will love, learn and grow. For now, you are exactly where you need to be. Take care of yourself and keep learning those lessons that you see so much of right now.

Warm hugs
Lily.

Lily you are spot on. Relationships are not “until death do us part” UNLESS that is the lesson. People come into our lives and some will stay forever but most will disappear making way for new connections, new lessons, new ways of being. My husband and I have been together for nearly 30 years and are still committed to the relationship, we really LIKE each other as well as love each other. Prior to that I had 2 men I truly loved, one is still a dear and valued friend, the other has passed on. The ending of both these two relationships came with so much sadness. I survived. I look back now and think thankyou for the lessons but I am glad to be with my husband. Also, just having a partner is NOT the purpose of life, the purpose of a partner is to experience love, support, being accepted for who you are, nurtured, cherished. YOU set the standards of conduct – what will I or won’t I accept! That is your choice. You cannot choose what they will be or do. You can not change them nor walk their life’s path, you can only walk your own.

Love and- abuse, violence(in any form) , disrespect – cannot walk through one door. How much do you value you? If you place little value on yourself -why should the other person value you? Life takes you at your own valuation. Make your valuation beautiful, wonderful, loving, respectful and the right partner will enter your life.

Blessings,
Elisabeth