Dear Leenbean:
As to your last question: will you find someone else like him? I hope not. I hope you find someone who you are attracted to AND have a committed, monogamous relationship with.
Clearly, you want both. You wrote: “he just wants the sex and a friendship, but no commitment. He’s a very affectionate and caring person so it makes no sense.”- I would like to point to you how these two things do make sense together:
His affection and caring for you is limited to the times he spends with you sexually and shortly before and after. His affection and caring for you does not extend beyond those limited-time events.
I wouldn’t look, if I was you, for a god to give you a sign, or for your intuition to lead you here, not when intuition is wanting something so intensely we make ourselves believe it is real or is likely to become real.
Instead look at what is and what is likely to happen. Lots of things are possible, but not likely. Go with what is likely, or very likely. If you want him to “wake up” and realize he loves you and want a relationship only with you, it is less likely to happen if you continue the way it is, and more likely to happen if you don’t.
The man is not very honest. He told you to not fall for him, but his concern is not that you don’t fall in love with him, that you don’t suffer. His concern is to have a good sexual time with you.
Most often, there is nothing magical for a man who has women available sexually for him, nothing magical about sex. It is magical for you, in your mind, but not in his. This is my best understanding of your situation.
And so, unless you have different thoughts or more information (feel free to share, if you do)- my advice is to let him go.
anita