Wow dreaming715, how cool is that that you’re coming back here a year later and things have been changing for you?! I’m in my mid-50s, and I’m not going to give up either!

Sorry for chiming in so late. Just read this.

Singlehood shows up as a typo when you plug it in. It shouldn’t be, but it is. Singlehood shouldn’t feel like a typo or mistake. Embrace it as a lifestyle of deciding what things are important, why they are that way, etc. instead of having those decisions made for you. My situation is considerably different in that I have a 13 year old and an 11 year old full-time as a single dad.

Respectfully as a guy who is very passively looking, thoughts about marriage, pregnancy, and things of that sort from the outset tend to freak us out. Things change every day and let them…don’t force them.

Coming to terms with remaining alone for the rest of your life is probably one of the most painful situations to accept in life. But it is important to come to peace with this possibility. .. regardless of whether you are cuare currently single or not. Because even if youve found ‘the one’ you could lose them anytime.

The really painful part though is not ever experiencing being in love with someone and being loved back by them. That is almost as painful as experiencing it, and then losing it!

So how can one wrap ones head around it? In my view, hoping is what hurts the most. Dangling carrots that say ‘it will come at the right time, when youre ready, when you least expect it’… because the hard truth is that for many of us, it simply doesnt.

Its always smart to be prepared for the worst case scenario in these issues. Because if love does happen, the problem is seemingly solved so theres really no point in thinking positively because if that were to happen there wouldnt be any problem. Its smarter to go about life thinking of what you will do in case it doesnt happen, so that you are fully prepared for the worst. So in case love does come, its a bonus.

In my case l had the good fortune of meeting three or four men whom l fell in love with. Im forty now. Unfortunately none of them liked me.

At the same time quite a few guys liked me but l wasnt attracted to them.

For me, l find happiness in loving rather than being loved. So unrequited love isnt an issue for me. Im just so grateful and happy that some guy.. even if he isnt attracted to me… makes my heart go round in cartwheels

Now because lve never been loved by any man lve loved l remained a virgin because l would only want to have sex with a man who l loved and who loved me back

So l have missed out on that experience which lm really no regrets because sex without love is not worth wanting… plus as a woman it would only harm me physically amd other ways… so in a way my choice is easy.

So l live my life hoping to fall in love not expecting to be loved back feeling happy that im healthy and have no responsibility like marriage mortgage kids etc.

Im lucky. Im living a good life women in past generations were denied. They were forced to marry and reproduce with men they didnt love

Im lucky. Youre lucky. We have time to do things. We could change the laws and fight important causes. Im passionate about certain women’s rights and the right to die. I think that making change in society is a great opportunity.

So use your precious time to do important and meaningful things.

And grieve for your loss. The losses of thos things that didnt happen that may never happen. The happiness that you may never experience. Grieve for it. And also recognise and be grateful for the opportunities you do have. Use your voice . Talk and write. And most importantly, think. Read and listen to others, to the great thinkers.

Keep looking for what you want never give up. But be prepared to never find it. Mourn for that. Above all, in all areas you can control, live your life with truth and dont compromise on what is most important for you.