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Broke off 8 year relationship

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Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
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  • January 30, 2017 at 8:15 am #126388
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear lobofenrir:

    Yes, it is fresh. It takes time to get used to a new reality. It is a certain shock to the brain, like a little earthquake, or… brain quake, to have a different reality in front of you and it takes time for the dust of that shock to settle. If posting here helps with the dust settling, do post again.

    anita

    January 30, 2017 at 9:43 am #126391
    Fenrir
    Participant

    Thank you. I feel like the guilt is kicking in and there’s no guarantee that i will be with my old friend since she has her own issues to work out but i kept thinking to myself that fear of being alone or rejected isnt a good enough reason to stay in a relationship. The guilt is really harsh but if i go back now i feel like it will eventually wear off and i’ll keep feeling this way towards my friend and keep talking to her in secret. They both deserve better than that.
    I guess the shock is still fresh from the brain quake

    January 30, 2017 at 9:58 am #126394
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Lobofenrir:

    You have this admirable value, which I share, to do right by others. You wanted to do right by your long term girlfriend. The downside to your choice is your fear of being alone and guilt for hurting her. If it wasn’t for the price to pay in making the right decisions, making the right decisions would be so easy.

    People told you that you made the right choice. It doesn’t feel perfectly wonderful though, and often, the right choices do not. Keep your values and the long term benefits in mind as you endure the short term discomfort.

    anita

    January 30, 2017 at 8:44 pm #126432
    Jennifer Boyatt
    Participant

    It’s going to hurt for a bit. *big hugs* But you only have one life, and I think you realized you can’t live it in pretending with someone. Bless you.
    ~Jennifer

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