Board Meeting of Inner Selves

[Sann]

Wow, you seem to be doing good Anita.
I like it how some of them are trying to help each other.

Jack and Anita, you guys are inspiring. You convinced to also sit down and start writing mine down – had thought about that a few times. I’m surprised at how fast it goes, once you start looking at them, i’m seeing more and more of them and am not fast enough to write them all down. So interesting.

[Sann]

I’m also looking forward to see the rest of your meeting.
Hope you’re not doing extra time in the night, cause it looks tiring with all these types.

[jock]

Sann
This is by far m.ore rewarding than any job I’ve done.
The creative process for all of us, once we tap into it, drives itself.
And its self-healing as well.
I owe it to myself to go further with this.

[jock]

Chairman: Any other general business?
Rumi Ron: I’d like to propose that we send an angry email to my work colleague. I’m fed up. He has been making sarcastic comments about my incompetence, gossiping to others about my weirdness and laughing at the way I talk. He called me a turkey the other day. It’s just unfair and outrageous.
Adam the Adult: What would be the nature of the email?
Rumi Ron: (reads email)”Hey Brainless! This email is a warning. If you continue to harass me, I will not only report you to the boss, but I will contact my lawyer, even the police. Stop it I say! Stop it right now!”
Analytical Al: Bit emotional don’t you think, Ron?
Rumi Ron: That’s the problem with you Al. You don’t understand emotion. I’m fed up!
Chairman Chuck: I suggest you cool down before you write anything.
Llama Jack: At least, he didn’t call you a llama, Ron!
Ron: Ha Ha. No time for your wit LJ. This is serious!
Adam the Adult: Why can’t you ask to talk to him face to face?
Ron: You make it sound easy.
Al: It’s not easy I admit Ron. He is much taller than you and can look intimidating.
Chairman: You could request a meeting with your line manager?
Adam the Adult: I disagree.He needs to sort to sort this out face to face.
Ron: Ok you do it Adam then if you’re so tough.
Chairman: We all have to go together. Strength in numbers
Adam the Adult: I can do this myself I think. Dig deep, visualise and don’t react.
Ron: I’m offended now. Are you saying I’m too reactive?
Marvin the Monster: Yes he is. You are over reactive, oversensitive and over the hill. You are more pathetic than Norman!

[Anonymous]

HA HA HA

Marvin the Monster gets the last word second time in a row. I hate him. LJ for Llama Jack. Ron is the dominant one in this meeting, I like his passion, had a lot time stewing. I do like his email though. I, me and myself wanted to send emails like that thousands of times. I did ruminate a lot! I did plan a thousand ways…

Argue-back-Becky: she repeatedly plays in my head conversations, mostly anticipated, made up, particularly people arguing with me, criticizing me, making a case against me, telling me I am wrong AND she comes back with answers, arguing back, making her case. It is a mess.

This really does have therapeutic potential. At first I thought of all this as entertainment, which it still is, but I see the therapeutic potential!

Fat Fat Fran: she is very fat. I see her in the mirror. She resides in me and she keeps scaring me: I am getting fatter and fatter and there is nothing you can do about it, nah nah nah. Running-around Renee is trying to burn calories but Fat Fat Fran will have none of that: your knees will break before I lose an ounce! Nah nah nah!

I hate her, she is the most annoying of my inner selves.

* Sann, feel free to let loose an inner self or two of your own. Don’t let your inner critic tell you that you have to produce some fancy inner self, any old inner self will do.

anita

[jock]

good point about Marvin, an obvious one too.
Fat Fat Fran does sound like a pain. I mean you are thin and she’s still bothering you!
You got a few trouble makers there too, I see Anita.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I do, Jack.

Fat Fat Fran is loud this very evening and she has something to tell you, Jack: “This woman, anita, she is FAT, Jack. don’t believe a word she says otherwise. She is getting fatter by the moment, exploding out of her clothes. did she tell you she quietly put all her regular pants high on the shelf and is wearing only stretchy pants and skirts? She is out of control! Tomorrow morning when she wakes up, she will be all fat, a big whale, it will be quite a sight.

Sorry, Jack, I know you are.. well overweight, and I hate sounding, well I hate the way Fat Fat Fran talks about being fat, but she is very vocal. She is my biggest motivation to get back on tranquilizers (abstinent from any psychiatric drugs for two years this month!)

anita

[jock]

Chairman: Just for a change of pace, we’ll do something different now. Let’s play Hot Seat. Any volunteers?
Ron: I volunteer Marvin into the Hot Seat.
Norman: I second that! (nervous voice)
Marvin: What!! How dare you Ron! And Norman? You wait! I’ll get you for this..
Please no Pressure Percy (aka Highly Strung Hyena): That is a great idea!
Marvin: What! This is a conspiracy!
Chairman: Ok Marvin. Looks Like you’re in the hot seat. Basically you sit out the front and answer any questions from anyone. You must answer honestly.
(Marvin trudges slowly to the front and sits in the hot seat)
Analytical Al: Marvin, who are you? Why do you exist?
Marvin: I don’t know. All I know is I love scaring the pants out of Norm and Ron, oh and Percy too.
Al: Ok. I’ll tell you. You are a result of Jack’s masochistic need to continue punishing himself. He based you on a combination of older siblings and their worst bullying tactics. Add some religious guilt and wa la!
Marvin: OK. Thanks Al. (sarcastically) Now I know who I am. I thought I was just a thug!
Norman: (shaking) Why are you so mean to us? Me and Ron and Hyena)
Marvin: I’m just doing my job. Didn’t Al just answer that question?
Ron: Yeah, why do you attack me? I’m helping you out anyway by brooding on past negatives.
Marvin: I don’t thank anyone. it’s not my style.
Adam Adult: You admit you are just a thug. We don’t need thugs. just leave, will you.
Marvin: I’m not ready to leave yet. you’ll have to drag me out.
Chairman: We can vote you out Marvin.
Marvin: Oh, I didn’t know that.

[jock]

This is getting corny, weak sentimental. I’m starting to weary of it, so better to stop before it becomes really pathetic 🙂
But it has served its purpose for me.
I wonder if some people only have one or two inner selves? I envy that kind of simplicity. Still it only takes two to argue.

My writing reveals to me that I blame Marvin for basically everything, especially lack of confidence and to a less extent, Ruminator Ron.
Better not to blame anyone. But it would be nice if Marvin could at least have a vacation.

[Anonymous]

Dear Jack;

Excellent two last posts for my Good Morning Gertrude to ponder this morning (she has only a couple of hours with me in the mornings, she is more peaceful and clear than the other Inner Selves).

The second post of today, starting with “This is getting corny.” is Marvin talking. Once he was threatened with being voted out he is bullying the rest of you with: “You are corny, weak, pathetic… end this corny thread (before I get voted out!)

And then Marvin says to the rest of you: “Don’t blame me. Be nice: don’t blame ANYONE@” (Pious Pete loves this: turn the other cheek to Marvin!”)

And the thread ends so far with: well, it would be nice to have a vacation from Marvin (meaning he stays- I can hear the relief in Marvin’s voice).

I would like to see Marvin re-constructed- the superego has to be there, the one that evolved for the purpose of living effectively with other people, but let us… smooth the rough edges, to put it mildly, very mildly, let us put limits on Marvin. Let’s decide what about Marvin we keep and what we don’t keep.

Who decides that? The Ego, that healthy, growing part that makes the healthy decisions for the Id (Abe is a pure Id part) and for the Superego so that the two, Id and Superego work for the same goal, your overall well being.

How about calling another board meeting for the purpose of not voting Marvin out, but reconstructing Marvin? If you choose not to, or even if you choose to do so, what do you think if I gather a few of my Inner Selves for such a meeting on your thread?

I would like to read you putting together such a meeting,

By the way, I am quire impressed by your writing! Wow indeed says Gertrude!

anita

[Anonymous]

Adam the Adult, Llama Jack, Chairman Chuck are your healthy Ego parts.Al and Ron were created by your Id, with help of rational faculties so to combat the abusive superego, Marvin. To intellectualize him away, to find out a way out of the torture. the suffering Id is Neurotic Norman.

Fat Fat Fran is my abusive superego, Gertrude is healthy Ego, Running around Renee and Argue Back Becky created by my tortured Id to combat my abusive superego, to please Fat Fat Fran by getting thin (running around) and by literally arguing (Becky)

anita

[Anonymous]

Corrections: I am QUITE not quire impressed by your (skill and talent) writing.

And correction: your Al and Ron and my Running around Renee and Argue Back Becky (among others) are creations not of the Id but of the struggling Ego of past to combat the abusive Ego. These are not the creations of the Id.

The Id during these decades has been invisible, there but not seen, expressing itself but not adequately acknowledged. It is simple, not creative. It simply IS loving and good.

With a healthier Ego we can find better ways to… reconstruct the superego/

anita

[jock]

Anita
your analysis is absolutely brilliant and keeps me motivated.
I don’t think I could’ve done so well without your interest
and please go ahead with your idea about using your inner selves to deconstruct Marvin
thanks again 🙂

[Anonymous]

Dear Jack:

Deconstruct and reconstruct Marvin, or the toxic Superego so it is a … user- friendly superego, is my goal for myself and my suggested goal for you and for any interested reader of this thread.

It may be easier now because I just had a bigger lunch finished with a biscuit (English biscuit, thought about you, Jack)

Fat Fat Fran: You pig, you ate like a pig, feel that food going down your system, it’s going to end up bloating the hell out of you and then increasing the mass of your flesh so you are spread in all directions, those folds of fat shaking with every step you take. Disgusting!

End of the world Wanda: And you cannot stop eating so you are going to get so fat you will not be able to walk or exit the bedroom and before you know it, you are an invalid and better be dead because what is the use. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

Running around Renee: I can run around for three hours, that will give me… 600 calories burned…

Counting calorie Caroline: maybe it is not so bad, or maybe it is. Let me see how many calories I consumed: cereal, 250, coffee 50, fruits…. 1,100, 450 to go to make it 1,550, the allowable number for today.

Running around Renee: Add to it the 600 I will burn, that gives me how many allowable calories for dinner?

Fat Fat Fran: You are so fat!

End of the world Wanda: And your knees will break from running so much and then you will get fatter even faster. It is all too late now. It is all over. The world is ending.

(I forgot my superego inner self, darn, need to take a break and review. I feel terrible right now with Fat Fat Fran and End of the world Wanda giving me hell. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

[Sann]

Anita
your analysis is absolutely brilliant and keeps me motivated.
I don’t think I could’ve done so well without your interest
and please go ahead with your idea about using your inner selves to deconstruct Marvin
thanks again 🙂

I agree.
Both of you are amazing.

I was smiling with the hot seat idea actually. Because a while ago i did an exercise called ‘three chairs conversation’ where you let 2 parts of you talk, the criticiser and the criticised, let’s say in your case it would be Marvin and perhaps Ron, and then on the third chair you put the healthy, compassionate, wise you to guide it. I love that exercise, and when i told somebody about that, she told me the first time about this concept, what you are doing here.

The 2 of you are just brilliant, thank you for all the free lessons and therapy sessions 🙂

[Author]

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