Board Meeting of Inner Selves

[jock]

Chairman Chuck: I’d like to call our first official board meeting of inner selves, open. Are there any apologies?
Analytical Al: Ruminator Ron says he’ll be late but he should make it.
Chairman Chuck: OK, there are no minutes of the last meeting to be read because this is our first official meeting. Could we have the treasurer’s report?
Adam the Adult: Our outgoings are still bigger than our incomings. We need to tighten out belt.
Llama Jack: We can’t tighten our belt anymore. It’s already at a waste measurement of 107cm.
Chairman Chuck: Ok Llama, could we just limit the attempts at humour today? We have a lot to get through.
Llama Jack: (yawns) Sorry.
Neurotic Norman: Oh here’s Ruminator now. Hi Ron.
Ruminator Ron: Sorry I’m late. I got caught up with that rude work colleague from yesterday. We really need to tell the boss about him .
Chairman Chuck: Sit down Ron and behave yourself. You’re worse than Llama. Now any general business?
Animalistic Abe: (stands up)I’d like to move a motion that we are allowed to eat and drink during meetings.
Chairman Chuck: Any seconders?
Pious Pete: I’d like to speak against the motion.
Chairman Chuck: Sit down Pete. First are there any seconders.
Neurotic Norman: I’ll second that…..if you all don’t mind that is..

• This topic was modified 9 years, 2 months ago by jock.
• This topic was modified 9 years, 2 months ago by jock.

[Anonymous]

Dear Jack:

These are my thoughts as I am reading this: “What a treat for me! What a treat (smile and rubbing of hands in anticipation) This is my compensation for an out of order Tiny Buddha for the last two, three days. I KNEW Llama Jack was going to make a joke about the tightening of the belt. I had no doubt. As a matter of fact I thought that Chairman Chuck made the comment about tightening the belt so that Llama Jack can jump in with his anticipated joke. In other words I think this belt comment and joke were staged.

And of course Ruminator Ron is late. Surprising Analytical Alan was able to remove himself from Ruminator Ron and attend the meeting. And Neurotic Norman is the one worrying about Ruminator Ron being late, how neurotic indeed. (Ruminator Ron is making things worse for you, Neurotic Norman, so of course you are worried about him not being there…)

I am trying to control myself (control what I am not sure) as I read Animalistic Abe’s motion, (and by the way, I just finished a wonderful dinner and was going to ruminate about it being over. Luckily for me I came across this thread and there is something pleasant, funny and entertaining to take my mind away from the fact I still want to eat).

I am not surprised Neurotic Norman supported the motion, it is his way to distract from his neurosis of course (he is the one pondering whether to get another biscuit most of the time, isn’t he the one? I mean pondering and sometimes giving in (second-ing) Animalistic Abe’s cries or motions to eat?

MORE, MORE, MORE, I want more of the meeting!

anita

[jock]

thanks anita
hope it doesn’t annoy others but it is good creative writing practice for me as well as self-therapy

[Anonymous]

Dear Neurotic Norman”:

If it annoys others, let them bring the matter to Chairman Chuck, so don’t worry your neurotic precious you about this!
anita

[jock]

I notice that LLama Jack can become predictable and thus unfunny, after reading your comment. Thanks for pointing that out.

[Anonymous]

Dear Analytical Alan:

Is that you? I don’t know if I hear sarcasm, but not aware of Sarcastic Sam, so it can be you. Don’t tell Ron, we don’t want him ruminating about this, and Neurotic Norman, stop biting your nails or bugging Animalistic Abe to get another biscuit!

anita

[jock]

Anita
an honest question
do you think my level of insanity is above average?
I mean how many people would start a thread like this?

[jock]

(continued)

Chairman Chuck: All those in favour say “Aye”
All (except Pious Pete): Aye
Chairman: The Ayes have it. Motion carried . You are all allowed to eat and drink as much as you like during meetings.
Animalistic Abe: (brings out a packet of choc chip biscuits) I’d love to share but sorry they’re all mine.
Pious Pete: Don’t be so selfish.
Animal Abe: Pete you go on a diet and I’ll pack on the pounds.
Pious Pete: We’re supposed to be working together here. Like one happy functional family.
Chairman: I think Peter has a point there. Either we all eat or we all go without.
Adult Adam: Otherwise we’re working at cross purposes.
Ruminator Ron: Yeah all this recent ruminatin’ is makin’ me hungry too.
Animal Abe: Oh ok then. here you all are.
Neurotic Norm: I’ll go without so there’s more for the rest of you.
Marvin Monster: Norm, shut up and eat or I’ll blame you for everything….again!

• This reply was modified 9 years, 2 months ago by jock.

[Sann]

I’m following.
I think you are brilliant Jack, that is an interesting thread.
I am learning a lot from you.

[Anonymous]

Dear Jack:

First thing in my Friday morning and… another treat! Marvin Monster included, poor Neurotic Norm suffering under the abuse of Marvin Monster. I am surprised Animal Abe is sharing biscuits (aka cookies) – Animal Anita (if I may copy your idea for just this purpose here) does not like to share food. Pious Pete is hilarious, as usual, “don’t be selfish” – of course it is his job to spoil any good time. I wonder if you, Jack, ate biscuits following that second part of the board meeting, I mean it makes sense, that was your motivation and you… arranged it so that you got the Ayes before you went for another biscuit, clever you…

As to your question if I think your level of insanity is above average: No, I don’t think so at all. The average of insanity is pretty insane though. It is interesting you ask this, i recently announced myself to myself mentally healthy only because on average I am. I don’t have to be anywhere CLOSE to being perfectly mentally healthy, I just have to be above average mentally healthy, and that is not such a challenge, hence: I am mentally healthy. I view you as not so disturbed at all, your humor is evidence of your mental health really, and that answers the second question in a way: only ONE person in the whole world would come up with this thread and that is why I am so fortunate to enjoy it. I was just tempted to copy your idea with my inner selves. How do you feel about it? Should I try or would that be sacrilegious?

anita

[jock]

That’s a relief Anita. Go ahead. Would love to read yours.
Thanks Sann.

Coincidentally, it is my turn to chair a meeting next month at public speaking course. (hence the idea) Quite nervous about the role actually.

[Anonymous]

you have one month to chair meetings on this forum as preparation for that meeting you will chair. Feel free to use this very thread as preparation, calling a meeting regarding the planned meeting when all your inner selves will have to appear as one.

Regarding my idea of my own inner selves, I am humbled, first of all to do so on the thread of the master of inner selves, you! I am not intending to top your genius or even to well, I am amateur in inner selves business, so let’s see what happens, just for fun:

Animal Anita: will not share food. Will compete so she gets the biggest and best stuff to eat, always the biggest slice of the cake, the biggest portion of meat.

Intellectual Irene: she thinks the head is a separate entity, not connected to a neck and rest of body. She is indeed a floating head, living in a made up world where all are floating heads to be proven stupid and insane, heart and body not taken into consideration.

Annoyed Ann: she gets annoyed with people and things and often. If the sweater does not want to cooperate, she gets so hateful with the sweater she wants to kill it. I mean, hateful. People annoy her because their floating heads make no sense.

Scared Susan: She is just scared, repeatedly, all day long. What can you do…(Intellectual Irene tries to help but ineffectively and Annoyed Ann is also trying to help by quickly shifting fear into anger, again, ineffectively).

Fix-it Fiorina: she thinks she has to fix every single hurting soul, jump in with her floating head and fix the problem. Are you having a problem? My bad, my fault, the least I can do is fix it (Annoyed Ann turns into Angry Ann when the target does not get fixed).

How am I doing so far?

anita

[jock]

doing great
you got some comical characters in there, (annoyed ann and intellect irene)even you don’t mean them to be comical. But I can see now that Lama Anita is having a good laugh at herself, which looks very healthy to my way of thinking.
So are all of us carrying around with us a huge cast of characters in our minds all day? No wonder I’m exhausted by the end of the day. 🙂

[Anonymous]

Thank you Jack, I appreciate your support.

The-world-is-ending Wanda: she escalates every problem throughout the day, any whiff of a problem, any possibility, not to mention any actual problem to a catastrophic event, end of the world Armageddon. She does exhausts me so.

Might-as-well-not-feel-anything Maegan: she thinks she can take over and my life will be very simple because she is okay with anything, with the world ending, the sky falling down, nothing phases her. As a matter of fact she took over half an hour ago when I was doing my loop and a tree literally broke in the wind and fell down – was to hit me if I didn’t run. And I felt nothing. Otherwise, she is ineffective. She fools me repeatedly though, convincing me that I can really feel nothing.

I-ate-too-much Tammy: she just says it a lot, almost after every time i eat. Then of course, The-world-is-ending Wanda takes it further to belly exploding, literally.

Will be back hours from now.

anita

[jock]

love the names ! 🙂

[Author]

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