Hi * anita, so to me becoming fear-less is a few things. I think ALOT, probably too much and i evaluate every single thought i have, i need a reason WHY i feel the way i do, so i think about it some more, why am i so anxious, why am i thinking all of the time..does it mean im loosing my mind?? im sure nobody else does this.. the list goes on.. rumination i think its called.

I’ve been reading this book by Ruby Wax called “frazzled” and its explaining where these thoughts come from and my gosh i could spend my whole life digging until i got to the bottom but thats not what i need to do. Becoming Fear-less would mean that these thoughts could come into my mind but i could simple acknowledge them, accept them for what they are (just thoughts!) and carry on, becoming fear-less would mean i’m not afraid of how a thought could change my mood or make me feel a certain way because im in control of the whole process, this is what i need to learn , its tricky because its a learned habit and i need to unlearn it! I want to learn more about Cognitive behavioral therapy to do that.. all these things take commitment and i find that when i start feeling better after a low time i dont focus on working on all these things (another reason i joined Tiny Buddah MOTIVATION.

Also im a creature of comfort which i dont like because i miss out on a lot, i want to adventure and explore the world Try new things. Becoming fear-less would mean i do the things i want to do embracing the nerves but not letting my anxiety rule my mind with “what ifs” Dont get me wrong i do go places but its just the feelings i have when i’m at the destination, whether that be a new place on holidays or trying a new hobby, i want to fully experience it without worrying, does that make sense?

being fear-less would feeli like freedom, believing im capable, enjoying my life 100%, being present in the moment and accepting myself fully. I know life isnt always rosy, and im not aiming for that at all, my challenges teach me so much! i just hope i can glide through it all a little easier and with more confidence 🙂

Hey *dbielawski, i can completely sympathize with you as i have felt that way exactly many a time! I did notice when the depression fog clears you can think a little clearer about things and have a different perspective. At the moment i think you need to be kind to yourself and do what you need to do to start feeling better. If that means curling up in your pjs and watching movies for a day SO BE IT! im still learning this one. The world doesnt fall apart if we have a down day, its hard to shake the guilt though. I cant give you medical advice obviously because im not a dr, but in my own personal experience with medication, talk it through thoroughly with your dr or a councilor, google wasn’t very helpful for me as i just read all the bad side affects that scared me even more! I would never say to stop a medication when you are starting to feel better, not until all the underlying issues are resolved and theres a weaning process when you and your dr have decided its time to come of them.

I take a medication called Lexapro which has worked wonders for me, i had a lot of help from my mum when i started these meds as she has dealt with mental illness her whole life and knows alot about them. im not keen to change my medication because they do help alot. When the most recent dr i saw prescribed me Prozac i went and spoke to the chemist about my concerns… he was really really helpful! and im glad i did because apparently you cannot take prozac and lexapro at the same time because they are in the same group. the pharmacist advised to up my lexapro by 5mg ( this was something i had discussed with the dr that put me on the lexapr in the first place, as the backup for if i did get PND) so i knew i could do it.. NEVER SELF MEDICATE.

I can understand you would feel scared about changing meds because when you start them its not real nice and sometimes GPs dont explain this. Is there any chance you can go and see a Psychiatrist, they have the training to be able to prescibe meds after a thorough consult with you and how you are feeling? you can go and see a dr and ask for a refferal?

also do you have somebody that can support you through all of this, its much easier when you have help from somebody!! And please feel free to chat to me if you need to vent! im quite happy to walk the journey with you.

Hi *anita, i read you reply last night and have been thinking about what you said. I guess that when i start feeling better i don’t want to focus on anxiety any more because i don’t want it to run my life or define who i am, i feel i am in control when i am not struggling or having a panic attack…But then i thought a bit more about it (as i do) as you said “the anxiety is still lurking under the surface”

I took notice of this, its there in the tightness i hold in my muscles, sometimes i don’t even realize im doing it until i relax and go oh wow i was so tense, how did i not feel that. I hold my breath, another thing i do without realizing! until i take a big in breath and think oh goodness how long was i holding my breath for? i kind of hold myself when i am in a situation im not comfortable, cross my arms, or hold them close to my body instead of just standing open.. my body language is closed in new situations. i will wear my sunnies on off days to avoid eye contact. lots of little things that even though i cant “feel the anxiety panic” im still anxious… I know that this is going to take some time to master and i know i need to keep motivated to practicing new routines and habits. I do think that one day though that i WILL be able to get on top of the out of control anxiety.. for this i set no time limit, only take each day as it comes.

And yes Solve the problem , where did the xcessive fear come from, i am hoping the psychiatrist will offer some insight into this? and give me some guidance.I have some early childhood situations that i do think may have contributed to it, but im not sure how to fix it.

I am willing to discuss insight for sure but i was wondering if you could tell me a bit about your story? what led you here?

Kirsty

Hi Xenopus Tex,

Thanks for your opinion, I understand what you’re saying. Let me explain what I meant by my title of the thread. When I say I want to be Fear-less I’m saying I don’t want to be afraid of what I’m feeling, as in my over anxious thinking.

I don’t want to eliminate fear,anxiety or nervousness or any negative emotion because I know they guide me and help me grow, I just don’t want these feelings to stop me living my life to the fullest as they have been. Healthy fear is good, unhealthy fear of a situation or feeling that’s not dangerous is what I’m trying to overcome and be fear-less.

I hope that makes sense.

Kirsty