Sarah Jane,

Sometimes, when we encounter (prolonged) periods of extremities, we suffer so greatly that our minds, bodies and spirits strongly demands that we seek out solace and peace to regain our balance, our equilibrium. And sometimes, the insistence of the demand can morph into desperation thus further adding to our inner chaos and pushing us further away from bringing about order back into our lives. I’d like to say that in your case, you’ve suffered so immensely and continue to do so that it’s causing your search for tranquility to have manifested into such, or something similar. My dear, please be at some ease. While your head and heart may be brimming with chaos, the fact that you are seeking help means that you inherently wish happiness for yourself; a most wonderful notion! Please do take heed in recognizing this within you and draw strength from it.

As for getting there, please recall what I’ve mentioned: You’re suffering has been so grand that the damage may be of extreme extent. However, fret not, for all things can be mended; though it must be remembered that while ‘cure-alls’ do exist, they may not be found by everyone. It must be recalled that many small steps can have the same results as a few large leaps. The speed of the recovery is not what is of importance; ‘Progress’ is. While taking a plane to New York may get you there faster, taking the train will get you there eventually nonetheless. And, analogically speaking, each journey will share their shares of comforts and discomforts, likes and dislikes, pros and cons, etc…., for life is not perfect. Or, I should say, perfect as we would like it to be. And yet, should we allow the bumps in our lives to entirely ruin our view, our sentiments, our impressions and concepts of the beauty that can be? A climb is supposed to be difficult. However, it can equally be enjoyed. While the bumps that we each individually face vary, the fact that we all encounter them is the same. In this sense, you can say that ‘we’re all in this together’. None of us truly know what we are doing in life, none of us have all the answers and none of us ever will. These truths are how we can be understanding of one another, or forgiving, or compassionate or loving. Many of our actions are dictated by the unknown. Because of this, we cannot forsake one another for any and all actions we’ve performed. Especially the negative ones. Can you truly blame a rapist who was physically, sexually and mentally abused by a parent? Or both? And can you blame the parents for having negligent parents of their own? I understand that these are extreme examples but I solely used them so you could get my gist.

My friend, numerous small efforts and maintaining them goes a long way. We are each built differently. Some of us are capable of performing grand acts to change our mentalities and spirits for the better. However, some of us are only capable of the smaller ones. But, again, there is no shame or embarrassment in this. The destination will be reached nonetheless and we will arrive there exactly when we are meant to. Hence, there is no sense in forcing things that are (fully) uncontrollable. Simply grasping that we have one short existence, one shot and one opportunity to walk this earth and making it a memorable and meaningful one before becoming stardust should give us all the fortitude we need to give it all we’ve got. Don’t you think?

I hope this helps and please accept my apology for any grammatical errors I tend to make in long reply post.

Namaste

Al