Hello Cody!

Yes, I’ve had that experience. Right now, I don’t really know anyone who would be on the same page with me, but that might also be an error in my perception. In any case, there has been plenty of confusion on my part on how to relate to life and others. After any major changes, it’s hard to take the mundane seriously. Luckily, everything is slowly finding it’s place again. I do find pleasure in the most mundane things and superficial discussions. I could still talk about cosmetics for hours, because it’s something that interests me. What I’m not interested in though, is the drama and the whining and the complaining. I don’t enjoy Facebook anymore because of that. I have trouble with certain friendships where I need to listen to problems that clearly stem from the person with the problem and I don’t know what to say or how to help (female relationships usually require a lot of listening and agreeing instead of problem solving).

I feel more mature in my thinking and ways, which I enjoy. I’m also aware that the people I’ve known haven’t changed with me. The only times that truly bothers me is when I’m afraid of falling back to old habits, when I’m feeling insecure. Sometimes it makes me sad, because I feel the need to connect on another level or when I see the confusion and I can’t make them see more clearly. Most of the times though, I focus on my own life and connect with myself or my surroundings in a more abstract way.

So I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s not so much about changing interests, but about change in the underlying intention. If someone feels joy and excitement with me about a particular subject, I’m happy to participate. If I can see that the motive is based on fear or need for drama (different from excitement), then I don’t want to get involved.

Cody,

I can understand the lack of enthusiasm or desire to talk about certain subjects. When we spend time in quiet, open space, sometimes when people are engaged in mindless chatter, its like “We could do almost anything (anything!) with our time, and this is our best? Do I want to be engaged here? Where’s my cave?” So, we disconnect and tune out, or disconnect through judgment, or whatever. Pull back, armor up, disengage.

However, we could also engage, but just do it in our way. For me, I think of it as exploring. OK, so these two guys are really involved in a conversation about a sporting event or movie or gossiping or judging or whatever. What’s the allure for them? Why is it so entertaining? Pulling back is fine too, if you’d rather sit on a cushion (in some form), by all means. The hermit goes into the cave to detach from the allure of those stories, to find his own heartsong, his style and approach. Said differently, stillness is fine and good, but is sustained through sharing, connecting, engaging. So, don’t be afraid to just let go and play… or the bliss becomes expended, the torch going out from staying in the cave too long. 🙂

Finally, consider that sometimes it take awhile to find a group of peers that sees basically the same thing, enjoys basically the same topics as we do… especially when we dive into spiritually aimed topics when we’re young. This is normal, so be patient, explore.

With warmth,
Matt

When we experience shifts is consciousness we can be a bit disorientated and, in some cases, impatient. There is a reason they say patience is a virtue. LOL!

The key to progressing is to not judge other people or their seemingly inane conversations. Kidding. The truth is that no one is capable of having serious conversations all of the time. So give them some slack. Maybe it is just God having fun after all.

More importantly use all of this as an opportunity to learn and expand your capacity for love.

It’s very hard to meet people that you’ll connect with on a spiritual level. Forget your expectations and open your heart. The “right” people show up when it is time. There is nothing you can do about it. Just accept that you have been given a wonderful gift (the shift) and be aware that it is now your responsibility to share this gift with others – implicitly by example most likely.

Start by learning to love yourself. And learn how to give yourself space; space to feel, space to process, space to read poetry, etc.