Home→Forums→Spirituality→Ascension: The Suicide Timebomb
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July 26, 2019 at 12:09 pm #305057TannhauserBlocked
He did it in the church porch with only the two of us present.
Tannhauser
July 26, 2019 at 12:19 pm #305063AnonymousGuestI am sorry, Tannhauser.
anita
July 26, 2019 at 3:09 pm #305085TannhauserBlockedThere was only me and him in the church porch. No one else was around.
But I am at least grateful to him for allowing me to see organised religion for what it truly is: a total sham. A delusion, along with that book of shit that goes by the name of the Bible.
I am now of the firm conviction that there is no God. I’ve been through too much and seen too many other people suffer and die slowly whilst on dialysis to believe in it all anymore. It is utter, utter crap. I’m done with it. How can we possibly believe in a God when there is nothing to measure such a thing by? There is no justice in this world. Therefore there is no God. Simple.
Best wishes,
Tannhauser
July 26, 2019 at 6:19 pm #305101AnonymousGuestDear Tannhauser:
I understand about the incident on the porch. It was just you and him, no one else.
You witnessed too much suffering, your own and others on dialysis and otherwise, too much pain, and “no justice in this world”.
Too much pain and no justice.
I wonder if you still play music in church and elsewhere, you are an organist if I remember correctly.
anita
July 26, 2019 at 11:07 pm #305137TannhauserBlockedHello anita,
I do still play music in church, but I can’t see myself doing that for much longer. Thankfully I also play and compose music outside of church.
I still cannot fully grasp why this man made fun of me. As well as saying the Rosary every day at church, he also tends the shrine of Our Lady outside in the grounds. On the surface, he appears to be a model Christian, but obviously looks are deceptive.
Best wishes,
Tannhauser
July 27, 2019 at 8:14 am #305181AnonymousGuestDear Tannhauser:
It’s a good thing you play and compose music. I wish I could hear it right now. The man who mocked you- I don’t know what motivated him. I have no idea, but a possibility as to why a person who says the Rosary every day at church and tends the shrine would mock another church goer: maybe, just maybe he was not in control of his behavior. Maybe he just found himself doing that, an act of impulsivity so strong that it took over.
Imagine a person so focused on religion, on being good according to religion, repressing the .. bad part of him and then, that bad part, so to speak, takes over for a moment.
Can that be what happened?
anita
July 27, 2019 at 8:50 am #305193TannhauserBlockedAnita,
The problem with Christianity is that it is a religion of excuses. We make excuses for difficult parts of the Bible, for God’s erratic behaviour, or for the fact that the Bible is wrong about the nature of the Earth and the solar system. We also make excuses for the bad behaviour of so-called Christians with the immortal line: “the church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints”.
I am tired of the excuses. What this man has done has really hit me hard and I don’t think I will get over it. I will have to leave now, I’ve seen through it all.
Best wishes,
Tannhauser
July 27, 2019 at 9:11 am #305197AnonymousGuestDear Tannhauser:
“the church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints”- I never read this saying. Well, if it is a hospital for sinners, someone good and dependable, assertive, competent and responsible should be in charge of this hospital and see to it that some of the patients in the hospital don’t hurt others.
I can see why you want to leave that hospital. Interesting- in true hospitals, patients get infected with other patients’ illnesses, and the doctors, nurses etc. don’t always wash their hands moving from one patient to the next, that is, they don’t do their jobs responsibly.
anita
July 28, 2019 at 3:30 pm #305385TannhauserBlockedAnita,
I have decided to abandon all forms of spirituality, for I fear it is rotting my brain. I seem to be exhibiting all the classic signs of a grandiose delusion. I hate my parents for indoctrinating me into religion. It is their fault. I was a happier person before I was indoctrinated. I didn’t need God when I was a child. And I just accepted life as it was.
I hope that religion dies, for the sake of all the children of the world.
Best wishes,
Tannhauser
July 29, 2019 at 7:00 am #305483AnonymousGuestDear Tannhauser:
“I was a happier person before I was indoctrinated”- do you mean that your parents entered the Catholic Church, or became religious later in your childhood (at what age?), and your life was better before they became religious?
anita
July 29, 2019 at 1:24 pm #305551TannhauserBlockedMy parents aren’t overtly religious. In fact they rarely mention God. You don’t really notice the Catholic mind-worm when your young, in fact my experiences of Catholicism at school were largely positive. It’s only later, when you run into the difficult issues concerning sex that the problems crop up. Should you have the misfortune to read the Magisterium’s thought on such subjects, you’ll feel so dirty and worthless that it can actually cause suicidal ideation. I stopped testosterone medication because of this, that’s how much of an effect Catholicism still has on people’s lives. I just wasn’t allowed to be human.
My life was much better when I was a child, when God never entered my head. I believe religion and belief are forms of mental illness. The more you concern yourself with God in your mind, the more unhappy you become.
At the moment, I have never felt as unhappy in all my life, which is why I’m dumping spirituality for the sake of my sanity.
Best wishes,
Tannhauser
July 29, 2019 at 1:48 pm #305561AnonymousGuestDear Tannhauser:
You stopped testosterone medication because of shame inflicted on you by religious writings, too bad. Too bad that religion had such a harmful affect on you.
“which is why I’m dumping spirituality for the sake of my sanity”- I am glad you care about your sanity and hope that you would indeed dump anything and everything that promotes sickness.
anita
July 29, 2019 at 3:14 pm #305583TannhauserBlockedThanks Anita
Tannhauser
July 29, 2019 at 3:16 pm #305587AnonymousGuestYou are welcome, Tannhauser.
anita
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