Yes, anger is one of the hardest feelings to let go, imo. It intertwines so heavily with the ego that it feels like losing a great battle to give up the anger while it’s overpowering me. I think meditation can be a great help to people who become overwhelmed by feelings of anger. Meditation teaches us to be aware of our body and our connection to it (example: doing a buddhist body scan throughout the day helped me notice that when I’m stressed, I tend to hold tension in my upper back and forehead). I think we can use the “rage energy” in a constructive manner, though, if we choose to. We can turn that energy into whatever we wish – it is purely energy after all.

The water kettle of my life never knew what cooling down meant, it was normal for my steam whistle to blow off at any moment without warning. Having this uncontrolled rage living inside of me never actually gave me a sense of alarm. In fact I began to embrace it, all of this energy surging inside of me, if I could get angry before going out the door; I knew it was going to be a good day or at least I thought of it as one.

During the course of a week, if I had not engaged in at least five fist fights at school something was truly wrong. Forming relationships was difficult for me until I got into a sports program and got interested in females. Never allow females to get passed the walls I had built around myself. As a child I would witness a pattern of physical violence that was most distrubing. Because of what I had seen as a boy, I could never brutally harm anyone.

Anger for me became a need, an addiction as strong as opium and I knew that only a higher power as God was my only hope. It would take years for anger to lose its grip on my life. When I think about it, I shudder at how close I was to going over the edge.

It has been a road of discovery for me. First came forgiveness, self control, learning how to use this energy I had bottled up inside of me, peace, happiness and finally a bubbling fountain of joy. Love would not darken my door until I quit looking for it in all of the wrong places. Emotions are generally electro-charged bursts of energy which can enrich our life or destroy it.

When you are ready to step out of this emotion rollercoaster of rage, you may stumble or fall flat on your face but never give up. There is always a helping hand extended in your direction but it will remain out of reach unless you reach up and take hold of it firmly. Then you will be up on your feet again.

hey brokenbird,

it is best to find the source of your anger. if you say you have no control over the situation, you have to look at it in a different way. I have felt too that my situation was uncontrollable and worse I assumed being angry, and being angry constantly was just the way life was.

Unfortunately this has led to a lot of mental and physical issues. I blamed myself and people around me. I get destructive and unrealistic when I am angry. I am not sure if you feel the same. But there is hope in dissolving your anger and feeling good again. Of course you will be angry, calm down, and then remember it again, maybe a trigger or something will bring the angry thoughts back.

It was until I saw a therapist that I understood that I had a right to be angry. Maybe you have a right to be angry. Maybe you know the reasons for being so angry. Once you accept that you are angry all the time, and you have reasons then you can start working towards healing your anger. Even if you let go of the anger and it arises again, that’s completely normal.

Anger is a destructive cycle. It has taken me a long time (years) to realize how destructive my anger is. Once I even told my therapist that I didn’t feel like myself when I was happy, that anger was all that I knew. She said it was a vicious thought cycle and would take diligence in stopping it.

I still deal with it but I am more conscious of my triggers and have found what makes me calm down quicker. Joining forums, talking to others, friends and family, or even going to a therapist can help alleviate your symptoms and with more time and practice, you will be able to move on from the anger and be able to put out the fire before it gets stronger.

I hope some of this helps 🙂