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wisteria

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  • #34826
    wisteria
    Participant

    Hi Beth

    I enjoy that post as well and I find this post http://dev.tinybuddha.com/blog/5-tips-to-recognize-and-honor-your-needs-in-relationships/ is equally important.
    I really think its a combination of being at that place in your life where you are balanced emotionally and finding that right guy as well. Its all about chance but change is for the ready!
    Granted we can wait around for that love, we also have to actively put ourselves out there and search (I know…lol it seems contradicting to wait but to search as well).

    I think as a women this day and age its very important to state our needs and if he is a honest worthy guy then he will tell you whether or not he can meet your needs/is on the same page and looking for the same thing. Maybe is not an answer, it really means no.

    Just keep in mind that you deserve the best and he is out there waiting for you 😉

    Best of luck!

    #34825
    wisteria
    Participant

    Hi Pip

    I think the readers before me have responded well and given you some heartfelt advice and encouragement.

    I remember once reading an article regarding why relationships fail and how it can be a good thing. This was right after I got out of a toxic relationship. People come in and out of your lives to teach you something whether its a life lesson or something about yourself. Relationships end and people fade out of your lives because you’ve learned everything that they are meant to teach. Perhaps you can look at this situation as a blessing.

    Yes you were deceived but now you will be more aware and come out a stronger person. You will not fall for the same thing twice. You deserve better and you will find it. You can get through it all. You brought human beings into this world! You are a wonder woman.

    Best of luck. 🙂

    #34824
    wisteria
    Participant

    Hi Johnny

    My deepest condolences, losing a family member is heartbreaking. When my dog passed away in my arms I decided to prepare a photograph of her and weave a flower garland for her memorial. We packed her ashes in a beautiful scarf and laid her to rest with her favorite toys. We also kept a candle lit for her at the windowsill so she could find her way home.

    I’m sure Pinky T knows how much you love him and he will live on and return to your side in a different form.

    It’s about 3 years later and we welcomed a new addition to the family. We really think he is a reincarnation of my original puppy but she will always hold a special place in my heart.

    Best of luck to you.
    🙂

    #34823
    wisteria
    Participant

    Hi Nico

    It really sucks to hear what you went through but I know you will get through and learn from your experience. You’re a woman and can overcome anything!

    I would tell you what I’ve been telling most of my friends when it comes to dealing with guys….Its best to practice honesty and honoring your needs as a woman. This is different for everyone but can usually be outlined in reference to emotional/mental/spiritual/physical needs. There is actually a really great post which I will link here: http://dev.tinybuddha.com/blog/5-tips-to-recognize-and-honor-your-needs-in-relationships/

    If you tell them what you’re looking for straight out in the beginning then it takes the burden off of you as a woman. A good worthy guy will either tell you “yes” he is on the same page or “no” if he isn’t (“maybe” really means no). Now for those who aren’t straight out honest with you….then we really dont have control over their actions. But this way, at least we can free ourselves from the stress and be firm because you are setting boundaries and giving yourself a reminder of what you actually want.

    Granted at times there’s a bit of a wait period but I like to practice the 2 weeks maximum. Honestly though, if a guy is interested and want to develop a real romantic relationship with you, he will make it known and you will NOT have to play games. From the many guys that I talk to, they make it known on day 1 lol.

    My philosophy is….Men complain that women dont tell them what we want…well I like to take a different approach lol. There’s always that chance of “scaring him away” but that really means he wasn’t interested and isn’t at the same place in life as you.
    Anyways, dont be afraid of telling him what you’re looking for. It will make things easier in the long run rather than finding out months or years later. This is from my personal experience….I waited a couple of years without clarifying exactly what I want out of a relationship. Needless to say, I’ve moved on and am much more fulfilled and balanced.

    Dont worry, you will get through it. Dont let this one guy give you a negative impression of men in general. There are a lot of good and trustworthy men out there, its just the matter of weeding out the ones who aren’t worthy of your time and energy.

    Best of luck! 🙂

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)