I have been in the same situation as you where I cheated on my husband and fell in love with the other person. Life at home was difficult but not unbearable so I couldn’t realistically understand why I fell so heavily. You can read my story from back in January this year. I don’t know what things were like for you in the run up to the affair but I realised that I had neglected my own piece of mind for a while before the affair. I had spent so long looking after my family and my husband that I had forgotten to think about myself so by being paid attention by someone who was genuinely interested in me meant I was getting the attention I so desperately nedded. I would suggest spending some time on your own getting to know and like yourself again and enjoying simple activities such as walking and meditating. It will take a long time but slowly the dark clouds will start to lift and only then will you start to feel better about yourself and your relationship with your husband. I hope that helps x