I think you need to have your own space and tell him that you need to take some time for yourself to meditate and if he gets angry or refuses then tell him to respect your decision. If he doesn’t, he does not love you.

Once you have that alone time, no matter how much you feel like contacting him, DO NOT. Meditate on how you feel about him and regard him as a human being, striving to find his own happiness in this world too. Ask yourself what you feel like doing and consider if your decision will bring you ‘happiness’ or ‘pleasure’? Is your decision ‘skillful’ or ‘unskillful’? (Google skillful action and unskillful action related to buddhism)

Consider who makes you happier, your boyfriend or NY guy? If you made a decision to stick with your boyfriend, then let go of the NY guy even though you might hurt his feelings even more. If you decide you love the NY guy more and that he will make your life happier (not pleasure, happiness), then stick to it and do not harbor regret because you will end up suffering and making the NY guy suffer also.

Meditate and withdraw into yourself, considering every single factor in the situation and broaden your understanding of what each person is experiencing, including your own feelings. Ask yourself what course of action will be the best for yourself and for that person.

I hope this helps.