Hi there,
So strange I would stumble upon this thread today… My ex-fiancé left me exactly 1 year ago today. We were not as far into planning as you were, but just the same, I was crushed. My life and the future I had always wanted evaporated. Everything I always wanted – gone. The house, the kids, my life. The man of my life that I love so much had proactively, by his own volition, turned his back on me.
I had always wanted a lovely wedding, a nice dress, a great party with all my loved ones. But then, when you lose everything, you get to a point when you realized that it didn’t really matter what dress I was to wear or which venue we were to book – it was all gone.
Worse of it all, “he” was gone.
So then I finally understood why Big and Carrie ended up in town hall… At the end of day, what really matters? For me, it took me a long time, but the wedding stopped being important.
I still struggle everyday with the huge wound he left when he left. But then I think to myself “the house, the kids, that life: they never existed”
I would insert here all sorts of curses about how someone could pick up and call of an engagement but will try to stay polite.
Fight through it dreaming… It’s hard. It’s an everyday battle.
But as they say “No mud, No lotus”