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VJ

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  • VJ
    Participant

    Hi tinysparkofhope,

    Thanks for providing a detailed response.

    Continuing with the same numbering system

    1) You do have quite a good amount of understanding of the Law of Attraction.

    Every spiritual teacher or master teaches it differently and it gets confusing.

    Yes, practicing the Law of attraction got me very frustrated, just like you.

    Yes LOA happens all the time. But the main thing is in the following and practicing (more below). Its a universal law governing the universe. Just like the law of gravity if a ball is tossed up in the air it has to come down.

    2)

    “being ignored, being old and unwanted, hopelessness, unfairness, unlucky, fear that I will never work again and live in poverty and shame especially compared to others who are able to find a job reasonably quickly, people would pass me loads of their work to do, it would take me to 11pm at night to finish while they all left at 6pm, i was given their work” – hard to say No

    “I am forever their cheerleader” – people pleasing
    “I get really disappointed if I tried some strategy to the t and results do not happen”
    “tend to feel envy when people are doing so well in life” – jealousy
    “I feel sometimes that it isnā€™t fair that they get to display such negativity and still attract such a great outcome.”
    “I think they are unnecessarily ungrateful.”

    – It is not they who are ungrateful, but if you look closely it is you who are feeling the ungratefulness towards them.
    “so i kept low and did my job thinking that i must have manifested all this bad ill against me.” – keeping yourself low
    “not practicing self love” – Look where ‘Love’ is on the below link when you get there
    “i was doing all i can to get everyoneā€™s approval of me” – wanting approval

    https://postimg.org/image/runaangcp/
    (If the image disappears from the link then do reply back)

    Take a look at the attached Hawkins Scale of Consciousness. I’m sure you’ll relate as to what is the frequency of vibrations you may be emitting. I do not want to dwell much on all these as you are already aware that these are not so good feelings and I want to head straight to an actual “action point” for you (more below).

    “I feel sometimes that it isnā€™t fair that they get to display such negativity and still attract such a great outcome.”

    It could also be that they complained about things by speaking out and thus unknowingly/unconsciously RELEASED all their negativity and so attracted favourable situations in life.
    They may (or may not be) at a different situation at a later stage of their lives, but that is their karma and this is yours. So don’t bother much about them and leave them to what the Universe has to offer them.

    3) Yes I can truly understand that it is not possible to start afresh again.

    6)7) You are not doing anything wrong. You’re simply being human.

    4)8) “i am a good friend, i cheer people up when they are down and would help friends out in a heart beat. Also I suppose, I can make people laugh.”

    “I am good with planning stuff and researching places to go for family and friends.”

    From this I think that you can be of great benefit to others.
    More of these quality of yours referred below.

    Now for the action point-
    5) You need not spend any more on anything directed towards the self now, but something to start projecting them outwards.

    One of the universal laws is the Law of Opposites and it works in conjunction with the LOA.
    It states that no sooner will you call something into your reality than its exact opposite will also appear.
    Meaning – the moment you chose anything, any outcome, or experience – the exact opposite of that will come into your life in some way.
    It will show up in some way because it is necessary for the opposite to appear in order to create what you want. Life cannot be simply experienced out of nothing. There needs to be a context in which you can experience what you want.

    This can be explained with a simple example:
    If you want to experience Light then there needs to be Darkness. Can you see light when there is already light everywhere? You wouldn’t know what is light unless you saw darkness. Only when there is an opposite context field (darkness in a room), then you will experience Light (when it’s switched On), else everything is the same everywhere.

    Speaking in real life, if you start to see the “oppositions” (a context field) of your life as opportunities to bring what you want, only then you will fully experience the positive outcomes that you wish.

    We’ll not get much into it since I’m sure you may want to know of what to do next to get exactly what I desire in life.
    (I’m aware you do not want to spend anymore, and rightly so, but just in case if further interested then you can explore Neal Donald Walsch’s ‘Conversations with God’, ‘Happier than God’, etc.)

    Mechanism of Manifestation:
    If you understand collective consciousness then note that you are not alone in this world. There are lives of other people also involved in what we do.

    The Energy of Attraction is most effective when used for the purpose for which it was intended. (Another reason why LOA seems to be ineffective/disheartening because it is not used by people for the purpose for which it was intended)
    What is that purpose? To create a happy, peaceful, joyous life for everyone whose life you touch, and for you, in that order. The last three words is the key. This could be done in several ways and in whatever way you choose.

    In helping others, we shall help ourselves, for whatever good we give out completes the circle and comes back to us – Flora Edwards

    Help others achieve their dreams and you will achieve yours – Les Brown

    It is literally true that you can succeed best and quickest by helping others to succeed – Napolean Hill

    You can have anything in the world you want if you’ll just help enough other people get what they want – Zig Zaglar

    By focusing on others you multiply the amount of energy you emanate by the number of others with whom you do so. Give others every experience you wish to seek.
    The fastest way to have any experience is to cause others to have the same experience. Whatever you wish to experience in your own life, cause another to experience in theirs.
    If you wish to experience love, cause another to be loved.
    If you wish to experience abundance, cause another to be abundant.
    If you wish to experience success, cause another to be successful.
    If you wish to experience forgiveness, cause another to be forgiven.
    If you wish to experience peace, cause another to be at peace.

    And this can be done in innumerable ways depending on what you are good at and what you enjoy doing the most, but keeping in mind it is at first for the benefit of others.

    Since you now know several techniques and have spent so much, how about the possibility of starting a class or a study group for people having problems at least in a small way to begin with.

    Something like just posting a print-out at a suitable place near where you live that says – ‘Help yourself by healing yourself’, ‘Get rid of your unwanted thoughts, feelings and emotions, and gain back control of your life’…by using these XXX simple techniques, at a nominal charge. You can even put up on the bottom of the same page on giving Travel planning services.
    Or if you have a more inclination towards the Travel thing then you can do it vice-versa…Make the Travel line as your core by stating “Travel plans made easy!” giving all relevant details and on the same print-out mention at the bottom about the self help techniques classes. A set up (may be at a room in your home or only by phone) where people will just tell you their options like where they want to go (Domestic or International, a beach, or a hill station, or a wild life safari, an adventure package, 1 Day tour, or a weekend getaway) and what are they interested in (whether group tours or individual tours, or a honeymoon tour, or a corporate tour, or a senior citizen package, Solo, or a Family fun tour). Taking this data, your job will be to Research and Plan out their travel by giving them the quickest and best possible option(s) (since you said you are good at researching and planning things for people). Do this at a nominal charge in the beginning. Once again remember, while doing all this you are at your greatest best.

    Initially you can begin with close friends and relatives and then extend as it goes. Since people are going to come to you with problems they are already going to be feeling down. In the same class you can use your skills of cheering these people up and making them laugh. Note that when you are doing this you are putting up a frequency of genuine joy, to yourself and to others. When you are doing this you are not worrying about a job. Although you can keep applying to jobs at the same time, but in a detached way you should reach a stage like – It’s fine if I get a job. Even if I don’t get that’s OK too…Im enjoying here.
    This is why some releasing techniques teach us to release both good as well as bad feelings. You reach a state of bliss of no more longing to have anything because you feel that you already have all you need and that is where abundance starts to flow because you are emanating that.

    Why not make use of something for the benefit of others from i] what you have learnt all this while by spending so much and ii] from what you are good at?

    I know immediately a thought would occur as to how much you are going to earn by doing this? Is it going to be sufficient to fulfil my dreams and desires? Am I going to get customers? This is where our restricted mind will start to think all unwanted thoughts. For a change don’t take your thoughts too seriously.

    The Travel line of business and the classes/study group are just examples of what you can do. But I hope you are getting the point.

    Note that when you are actually doing all of this you are emitting up a frequency of genuine joy, happiness, cheerfulness and a state of bliss.
    And this is when the Law of Attraction comes into play.
    It is at this time things will start falling on your lap.
    On doing so you will start attracting the right people, situation, circumstances and events because you are emitting that high frequency.
    Either you will meet someone who could offer a job that you need, or someone in your class may have an acquaintance who has exactly what you need, or you receive a phone call from where you have applied for jobs earlier, or who knows you may want to continue with the travel/class itself as you are enjoying them….the list goes on and on and is endless.

    The Universe has infinite possibilities and we do not know now what will happen and how things will be manifested.

    Of course as humans it is not possible to be at those frequencies 100% percent of the time.
    At those low times, refer to the above chart of consciousness and see where you are and quickly bring yourself back on track, either by doing the self-help techniques that you are already aware of, or by getting busy with the travel/class which gives you joy and thus those lower states start to dissipate.

    9) If you are doing that genuinely then you may continue to do the Gratitude exercises as that is something you will continue to do irrespective of whether good or not so favourable situations are happening in your life. It could be very well that you are being returned to good things in life by you coming to this site.

    I hope it gives more clarity to you. When things start to get better in your life, which I’m sure will, please do share your progress.

    Also do remember to post your visiting card on this site so that I can be one of your customers who needs to plan his travel šŸ™‚

    Lots of Love and Light.

    Take care.
    VJ

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 2 months ago by VJ.
    in reply to: I am so frustrated and confused…… :( #113699
    VJ
    Participant

    Dear luvtahtsun,

    From your post it is clear that you have gone through a lot in life.

    Suppressed feelings – “I have suppressed a lot of my feeling”
    childhood traumas
    feeling abandoned
    not feeling acknowledged, not shown love and respect
    trying to deal with things from the past
    My anxiety is awful and Iā€™m depressed
    I know I have to figure out me and who I am. Itā€™s so very hard!

    But the good thing is you need not anymore.

    All of the above issues are simply beating you up. The mind does not have any answers anymore.
    And that is when you say…
    “It is so hard and i am having trouble understanding how to do all of this.”
    This is the time when a practical healing technique will take you out of your situation.

    For all your issues I suggest you to give a try to EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique). You need not spend anything as EFT is explained very well through various articles all over the internet and also through YouTube videos.

    It’s a simple technique to do.

    How would you be without all the above issues? Absolutely free. Isn’t it?

    Once you are “cleared” you will feel free and then comes the openness, freedom and choice to live limitlessly towards the life you have desired.

    You can do so while you continue your conversation on this site so that you get assistance from other members too.

    If you need any information please write back.

    Take care,
    VJ

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 2 months ago by VJ.
    in reply to: To New Members: #113688
    VJ
    Participant

    Hi Anita,

    Yes I agree about your disagreement to the things you mentioned in your response and its a personal opinion.

    Different people on this website are at different stages of the evolution of consciousness on the planet. Some may be “healed” with multiple conversations and some may require “healing” through various ‘life healing techniques’ or some may require both.

    Let’s each one of us on this website strive together to share what we have got and make this earth a better place to live.

    Take care.
    VJ

    VJ
    Participant

    Dear tinysparkofhope,

    I have gone through your post. Would you please take some time out and provide your response to the below so that I could suggest you something in the right direction.

    1) What is your definition or understanding of the Law of Attraction?
    Please elaborate as much as possible.

    2) Right from starting the job search till today – What are the underlying emotions you are having?
    Below are few examples I can help you start with-

    frustration
    tension
    worry
    nervousness
    a lacking feeling of not having more
    a wanting feeling because of the lacking feeling
    Shame
    Guilt
    Desire (in a craving way)
    Grief
    Fear
    Anger
    Pride (in a demanding way)
    Comparison of your life situation with others
    When people complained you about their lives, were you taking on their feelings onto you? Think closely for a while.

    Remove whatever is not applicable to you from the above list and add more. But make sure these are not necessarily only your current feelings. They should be listed from the time you have been trying for your desired job. To know the in-depth meaning of a word above, you can use the google search term as “define shame” which will show you Google’s dictionary meaning in an understandable way such as “a regrettable or unfortunate situation or action” which will then be easy for you to relate.

    3) What kind of profession do you like?

    4) What is that you think you will able to do which will serve other humans in some way or the other? Anything for the benefit of others? List down only non-professional work as opposed to point no 3. Think and try to list down multiple items. You can even list down certain things that you will be able to do after making certain adjustments.

    5) What things of you bother others or yourself?
    I procrastinate (or keep delaying things) and my wife doesn’t like it.
    I keep things in a messy way
    I am late most of the time
    I am not organized

    6) Identify and list if you are doing (or earlier did) anything incorrect? If you are uncomfortable about this then you can ignore it.
    Just Examples:
    I haven’t paid my friend back XX amount
    I skipped paying a few cents at that grocery store
    I am delaying to do this XXX

    7) What are things you mentioned in your post as “I feel like I have many many things yet to learn”

    8) List down all of techniques and retreats you have done so far. Don’t worry whether I will understand them or not. I have earlier undergone the techniques you mentioned, or at least read and understood them and so will be able to relate to your situation.

    Below is a List to begin with..please add

    EFT
    Chakra healing
    Practicing using the daily gratitude journal
    Letting Go – Was this the Release Technique Or the Sedona method you did?
    Numerology
    Working with crystals
    Feng Shui
    Career coach
    Meditation for 15 mins
    Provide a list of any other self help courses attended

    9) Daily Gratitude exercises
    On all the Thanks statements you mentioned in the post, be truthful to yourself and tell whether they were said simply involuntarily or were you really thankful and grateful for all those things? Meaning – When you did the gratitude exercises was there that genuine “feeling” of thankfulness in your heart similar to when somebody did something for you and you said “Thank you” to them?
    Was it the same level of feeling of gratitude equivalent to the grateful things you have mentioned as below?-
    “I am still grateful for a lot of things in my life, I got a rented roof over my head still, I got great friends”

    While writing a response to the above things itself, a deeper understanding on certain things will arise. Do not ignore paying attention to those.

    Do elaborate as much as possible.

    Also, people on this forum are ‘here’ to ‘hear’ you.

    in reply to: To New Members: #113579
    VJ
    Participant

    Hi anita,

    Not all vendors of Bach remedies use the minute percentage of alcohol in their remedies. Other ‘non-alcoholic’ ways of keeping the contents fresh include keeping the bottle in a fridge, or adding a teaspoon of cider vinegar or vegetable glycerine. Moreover, alcohol or brandy if used are for preservation purposes, just like they are used in our cough syrup, in which case they are used to allow inclusion of materials which wouldn’t otherwise dissolve in water or as a solvent.

    You may want to visit the FAQs on the below website
    http://www.bachcentre.com/centre/faq.htm
    especially on questions like –

    -Do you need to add alcohol to a mixing bottle?
    -Is it safe to take the remedies if you are a recovering alcoholic, given the brandy content?

    And if you still have more questions then you may visit the site’s Help -> Contact section.

    Your information from Wikipedia is right. But I do not need scientific evidence to understand how electricity works, although I still enjoy its benefits by watching television.

    I do not have a personal website on Bach Remedies nor I am in any way associated to these. It’s simply that I have used them and has effectively worked for me and to several others, at least as their reviews say so. I have also suggested information other than Bach remedies and there are more that are going to come based on personal experience.
    The varied list of links provided to a reader are just a collection of links on the web. I wish to make it easier for the reader by providing information that points out to the right page so that they do not need to do more of the digging. Of course, they can if they want to.

    I intend to share something that could work for a particular type of problem. Of course, its up to the reader who has the free will to decide whether to choose them or not. Due to varied types of personalities of people, some may give it a try, some may not. It’s just like while buying a new item, one would check what is it all about, what are the contents, positive vs negative reviews, efficacy of the product, pricing comparisons, etc.

    Moreover, Lori has done a neat job of having the Disclaimer on every single page of each forum.

    Per the Terms of Use-
    For your convenience, we may provide links to various other Websites that may be of interest to you and for your convenience only. However, Tiny Buddha does not control or endorse such Websites and is not responsible for their content nor is it responsible for the accuracy or reliability of any information, data, opinions, advice, or statements contained within such Websites. Please read the terms and conditions or terms of use policies of any other company or website you may link to from our website. These Terms of Use policy applies only to Tiny Buddhaā€™s website and the products and services Tiny Buddha offers. If you decide to access any of the third party sites linked to this Website, you do so at your own risk.

    DISCLAIMER
    This site is not intended to provide and does not constitute medical, legal, or other professional advice. The content on Tiny Buddha is designed to support, not replace, medical or psychiatric treatment. Please seek professional care if you believe you may have a condition. Before using the site, please read our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use.

    in reply to: I am so frustrated and confused…… :( #113572
    VJ
    Participant

    Dear luvthatsun,

    A warm welcome to TinyBuddha!

    “Why canā€™t I forget about him?? I know in my mind the relationship can never work but my heart tells me otherwise. Will the heart ever catch up to the brain”
    “I cry alot and still canā€™t get over him”
    “I feel sad and frustrated and just want to move on with my life. How do I make my mind stop thinking about him?”

    Yes, it is very important to distract yourself from those past thoughts/feelings/emotions/memories/stories/scenes, etc.
    At the same time, it is also difficult for the mind to do that and that is exactly what you are experiencing. No matter what we do, we can’t get over those thoughts from the head. It’s like – If I tell you to NOT think of blue elephants, the first thing that comes to the screen of the mind are blue elephants.

    Miniature Bodhisattva has very well laid out some

      practical tips

    to get things “out of your head”.
    Please do them. Also carry on with your counselling and meds.

    Along with them, you may also want to do some energy healing techniques.
    I have explained them on this page for a situation something similar to yours.

    I can not live normal anymore I can not accept it


    It’s on Quote

      #113485

    Search for 113485 on this page.

    I’m sure things will be alright.

    Take care.
    VJ

    in reply to: What are the best buddhist names for a new born baby? #113545
    VJ
    Participant

    Hi Shiv,

    In continuation to the above post, similarly, Boudhi or Baudhi can be the female versions of the name.

    in reply to: Paralysis and feeling stuck #113495
    VJ
    Participant

    Hey @Mel,

    I have gone through all your posts on this page…
    Since it is now just the feeling part that you would like to be healed, when you are saying “Iā€™m just fed up of feeling like this!”, can you summarize what is bothering you now?

    1) Browse the below link
    http://www.bachflower.com/bach-flower-remedy-questionnaire/

    2) Reply back with the name of the remedy/ies (in bold on the above link). And also post your issue(s) underneath it.

    For Example:

    Chestnut Bud-
    -I donā€™t learn from my experience
    -I keep repeating the same patterns

    If you are keen on using Bach flower remedies I may be able to help you with that depending on the issues you post.

    in reply to: I can not live normal anymore I can not accept it #113485
    VJ
    Participant

    Dear Qrasy,

    “My only wish is to live just 5 minutes in peace, without thinking about her.
    I would like to focus in the book I read, or when I prepare the food for my friends, or even when I drink my morning coffee.
    It is getting hard everyday.”

    You are at the right place. You are definitely going to be “heard” and be able to make peace with your situation.

    1) Do Hoā€™oponopono

    Iā€™M SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME THANK YOU I LOVE YOU
    Please do not miss going through the below link.

    http://www.laughteronlineuniversity.com/practice-hooponopono-four-simple-steps/

      Please note you are not saying this to that girl.

    Donā€™t worry about who youā€™re asking. Simply say it! Say it over and over. Mean it.
    You may ask it to whom you believe as God, or to Nature, or to the Universe, or to Life, or to your own self, or simply to nobody.

    Just say it either mentally, loudly or softly or however it is comfortable with you.

    If you do not feel love (like some people do), then you can also skip the last part of I LOVE YOU and rehearse the rest of the line.

    2) Another similar variation

    Format: I _______ FORGIVE YOU _____________, YOU PLEASE FORGIVE ME AND RELEASE ME
    Example: I FORGIVE YOU , YOU PLEASE FORGIVE ME AND RELEASE ME

    Keep saying this the same way. Either mentally, loudly or softly or however it works best for you.
    You said you can’t forget her or remove her from your head. So don’t try to remove. Instead, while saying the above, if the girl’s image comes to the screen of your mind, let it come, allow it to come. Don’t push it. Don’t resist it. What you resist will persist.

    While saying “YOU PLEASE FORGIVE ME AND RELEASE ME”, you can also imagine this person getting RELEASED from your head or wherever you said like in your chest. Don’t worry if you are weak in visualization like some people are. In that case, simply keep chanting.

    These energetic exercises do not necessarily always mean that you or they have done anything wrong, but it is to break the negative link or to cut the negative energy cords. The end result would be harmonious and in alignment with you and for your greater good.
    Soon you will be back on track with your life.

    Remember to say it as many times as possible. You can even say it involuntarily (meaning: just like alphabets ABCD… without thinking much about them). If you are doing something else and you are disturbed by her memories, then immediately start chanting and do it continuously till you are OK. Who is going to bother what’s going on in your head, so don’t worry about other people knowing it.

    You said you want to feel at peace even just for 5 minutes. Please do either or both of these at least for 1 full week and post back how you feel about your situation. You may want to rate the intensity of the issue before beginning the process (on a scale of 1 to 10) and then compare it after 1 week. I’m sure you are going to feel much more peaceful about it. You may very well continue after that until the situation or thoughts about the girl no more disturbs you. Thoughts may come but they lose their intensity and may no longer bother you anymore.

    Best Luck.

    in reply to: Months after break up its harder now? #113481
    VJ
    Participant

    Hi HikerGal74,

    I did this exactly as per what you wrote I agree with you that I let this go too quickly, however what is one supposed to do when someone is saying to you ā€œI donā€™t want to be in this any more I am unhappy.ā€

    Though it was not for a relationship issue but for a professional issue. I got the job lay off news and then I just asked one question “What is the criteria that the company is considering to downsize people?”
    After that I said “Go ahead and do the exit formalities”

    That was my last day at the job.

    Just like you I was fine for the initial few days and then thoughts/emotions started to creep up my mind…like “I was performing well, so why did I not fight back”, I also had rage and resentment about my superiors who may have directly or indirectly been involved in my lay off. But then I thought there is no point in thinking about all these thoughts as they are just a waste of time and energy.

    It is not that easy to simply stop thinking about something unpleasant happened. It has to happen by itself naturally through some practical technique. It has to be healed. It has to be released. Of course, it is said that time is the best healer/solution, but the past can run into our body’s energetic system for several years. We will just be kicking ourselves or beating ourselves up all the time asking the mind for a solution to get rid of this unpleasant past. The mind does not have an answer. It is like looking for something in an empty drawer of the table, but then finding nothing there.

    How about looking for a remedy coming straight from Mother Nature for problems exactly like this?

    I still cry 1-2xā€™s a week…if I am honest with myself, but lately I am really realizing I miss him, and it makes me so sad
    when I am alone at night he is never far from my thoughts-I worry that I still have this small sliver of hope we will reconnect one day.

    Take a look at these wonderful resources on Bach remedies and I’m sure you will relate it to your situation.

    Based on your situation it looks like you will need WALNUT and / or HONEYSUCKLE

    1) WALNUT

    Link 1 :http://mudraguide.com/bach-flower-remedies-walnut-and-change.html
    Snippet: Walnut is a great remedy that helps one to ā€˜move onā€™ without being tied to the old. It can very often sever the ties that bind you to an old love, old hurt or old anger so it has often been called the ā€˜link breakerā€™. It can also free a person who is being dominated by someone to become strong and move out as well as cutting oneself loose from an old and hopeless infatuation.

    It helps one accept and move on instead of wallowing in the past.

    Link 2 : http://www.bachflower.org/walnut.htm

    2) HONEYSUCKLE

    Link 1: http://mudraguide.com/bach-flower-remedies-honeysuckle-and-moping.html
    Link 2: http://www.bachflower.org/honeysuckle.htm

    I request you to patiently take time out to read about the above two remedies in its entirety.
    Since you are best aware of your situation and your state of mind, only you will be able to choose the right remedy (or combination of remedies).

    Don’t worry about their availability..they are easily available. And they are nature’s gift to mankind….coming straight from the DIVINE.
    The DIVINE may well be answering to your problems here and wants you to come out of the past and move on to a fresh new life that you have desired.

    in reply to: Letting emotions flow and depression #113480
    VJ
    Participant

    the official website did not print on the above post…
    it is – (www)(dot)thehealingcodes(dot)com

    in reply to: Letting emotions flow and depression #113479
    VJ
    Participant

    Hi Abraham Rodriguez,

    I’m not sure if you are already doing something to cope up with depression or if you are looking for some practical techniques that would bring about a change in your situation. So sharing something that I know and have used.

    It’s about ‘The Healing Codes’.

    Dr. Alex Loyd developed a technique after his wife Tracey “Hope” Loyd had severe depression for several years and couldn’t find anything to cure it.

    She speaks in this video..

    I got to know about this technique after purchasing the Healing Codes book from Amazon during my stay in the U.S. I did not practice the technique for depression, but for healing some old unpleasant memories.

    Read out the number of positive reviews on Amazon to know how it is helping people.

    Below is their official website.

    Home

    Just so that you know, I am aware of this technique and so can help you understand on how to do it whenever you are interested.

    in reply to: To New Members: #113476
    VJ
    Participant

    Hello everyone,

    I joined this site yesterday and I would like to introduce myself to the new members thread. Iā€™m an I.T. professional from India. Iā€™m interested in sharing various ā€˜Life Healing Techniquesā€™ with anyone who is facing any concern or challenge in their life.

    I have learned these techniques during my challenging times and still learning more of them as and when any roadblocks occur in my day to day life, and want to share those for the benefit of others.

    Comforting anyone with words do produce a healing effect, but I believe that doing a practical healing technique has greater effect than words like ā€œjust let it go/donā€™t worry/just relaxā€ (for eg). The problem with this is simply saying to ā€œlet it goā€ wonā€™t work. One must be guided ā€œhow to let it goā€. That is where these healing techniques come into play and cause a greater and lasting effect.

    This website is a wonderful place to know peopleā€™s problems, share helpful and knowledgeable information as well as seek for help.

    Warm regards,
    VJ.

    VJ
    Participant

    PS: something messed up after posting and the word NOT ended up on a separate line.

    VJ
    Participant

    Hi dreaming715,

    You are right in identifying about unrealistic expectations.

    @anita
    has already explained everything rightly, so keeping it simple…..

    True love is not about “wanting” the other person to behave in a particular way, but it is about “allowing” the other person to just BE.

    But at the same time, keep your senses open and just don’t “give-in” everything for the sake of the relationship.
    If you are looking for a long term relationship then bring that balance between what is fine with you and what is not.
    Meaning – does he intends to first get married or wait for some more time before going ahead with a good night kiss? Gradually figure this out. If you find out that he is

      NOT

    the kind of person who will love you and be interested in a good night kiss even after marriage, then that is the time for you to make a decision whether to go ahead and make this person a partner for life or not.

    Similarly figure out about other things in the relationship and work on striking the balance.

    Take care.

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