Dear Anita,

Thanks for your views..

“But the belief deep inside, that you are insignificant, will not allow the dreams to come true. Interestingly, even when a person who believes he is insignificant, even if his dream does come true (example, passing an important exam), the person still feels miserable, right after the first emotional high, perhaps”.

Maybe you are right in what you said above. I did experience exact same thing. People say whatever I’ve done till now is good enough to live a decent life. Yet I see no accomplishment. I’ve a younger brother. He is that son every parent boasts of and proud of. He achieved almost all of those wishes my parents had on me. I could not do anything that would make my parents proud.

I always thought that hard facts are more important than the faith/believe. You can’t possibly believe you have skills to fly a jet unless you have actually flown one. So I think in order for you to have a sense of accomplishment, you should have facts to back it up. And I don’t have any.

I had read somewhere that one should separate his profession, family and society from his sense of self-worth. Because the moment you base your self-worth on these, you start to measure it from others’ validation.

I have been thinking how to do that exactly.

Right now, passing that damned exam and securing a seat in that university is all I can think of that would help me come out of this. But in the long run, Grades, Degrees won’t bring happiness to me. I want to be able to look beyond those and don’t base my decisions on them.

Did any of this made sense to you? Sounds more like a rambling to me.

-Neo