Thanks @Jasmine-3 for your kind words.

I thought I would post an update in case my situation can be of any help to anyone else. I did what I was most scared of and I told him how I felt, and the short story is that we have ended things.
AND I FEEL OK.

That’s the most important bit.

It was last night, I told him I was scared to say these things, but I needed to be honest, and I told him essentially what I posted above. His response was that he doesn’t/can’t conceive of a future with love in it because of what he perceives as his ‘flaws’ and that he knew sooner or later I would see them too. I told him we are all flawed, but you don’t get anywhere in life without being able to take a risk that to get somewhere really, really good you have to take a chance there may be some bad. I told him his flaws don’t scare me and I was here, and ready to take the next step, and that I cared about him. He said he wanted me in his life but he can’t be someone that is working towards a future with me. It was very hard to hear. But I finally heard it, and I have cried a lot, and I now feel a strange sense of calm.

I just wanted to write this because I think the calm feeling is an end to this emotional roller coaster of not knowing, of feeling uncertain of where I stand, and of letting someone else pull all the strings of my own happiness. I did what I needed to do, and I put myself out there, and it stings that it didn’t work out. Don’t get me wrong I am very sad right now, and I can see roses that he bought me from where I am sitting, and that is a horrible reminder of how nice things were at points. I am sure I will have more tears about this. But deep deep inside I know this is a turning point- I can now get on with my life, knowing I was true to myself which is the single most important thing we can do.

All I hope is that this helps someone else who was a bit stuck like me.