I feel really sorry for the girl you are currently seeing, hanging on to her waiting to dump her if your ex takes you back! Is it fair to move on to a new relationship before you’re ready and when your hearts not in it?

I think you need to write a letter to your ex, even use what you wrote here, explaining exactly what happened and how you feel, and how much you love her. And then leave it at that, knowing you have done everything you can do. If she needs to move on and is happier, then let her go. If it’s meant to be then it will be. You might come together again in the future. Or you both might move on from this relationship, taking it’s lessons with you to your next love. But now you know the difference between lust and love, and that’s a very important lesson. This will all only make you stronger. Good luck