See legally things can be done….but i want to change my parents mind and accept him will full heart maybe half…cuz all he is thinking about is my parents.and someone who can even leave me for my parents…He is the one I want to be with cuz I feel no one in long term will be as right as him for my parents as well.at this point I have very little idea how I’ll do that…my mother says it’s impossible for her to accept..she can’t eat with him…and that whole of your family will be then from low caste ..your children…i want something else for you…he says leave this to destiny if it has to happen it’ll happen either ways..just focus on your career. My mother is soft at heart. Though she will be hurt for sometime. I really want to make it work.

About the suicide thing it was not that I’ll die..it was I can’t live like this.

I know I am being stubborn…but i want our parents and both of us happy.and i don’t want my parents to pay the price for it.Or least that they go through for it.Is it really this impossible thing for parents to say.My mother at this point has things like his daughter did intercaste marriage nd he died of grief.I have time to make her understand.please suggest.

I didn’t say about suicide and stuff to any of them…..I am home with my parents trying to be calm ..I didn’t text him as well.

Yes there was no practical plan to it.The heart wants what it wants.One more thought that troubles me is we know we had a good connection..he used to say he’ll never have that again with anyone …I even if it never happens can tell myself the other person didn’t have the courage to fight for it and he made peace with it.Will he always be at peace with this decision? Sometimes we realise things much later and then regret that things could have been different.I don’t know if he’s gonna be loved like that understood like that or what….scares me for myself too..and then seeing him with someone else will also be very hard for me.

So what the circumstances are these they can change…plan was not running away and getting married it was to wait and win over our parents hearts. Yus they said harsh things they don’t understand this but i know them….it would have been a tough fight but there was a big chance that in the end they would have agreed…..He says your parent’s respect in the society … Society .. people just talk about things for a month and move on with their life..parents will be angry for a year or two but then things will settle down and we’ll be together for a lifetime..which to me was worth it.I sometimes feel he will realise this at 32 and things will be very different then..i would have moved on and he’ll maybe live with this regret (only if he doesn’t find someone much better than me)

Okay.I feel I am too blown by emotions sometimes.

I have a feeling that if four of us can meet and discuss this there can be a solution to this.But both of them(my parents and him) have their issues.My parents are sometimes like okay we’ll meet him and then other day no we’ll not.Him on the other hand he says if there’s a meeting it’ll be at this home or he’ll come with his parents. He denied meeting them alone once. IDC scared of something or what. 2 years ago he was like i can talk to your mum.

What i am thinking..i am sorry but i am going to lie to him… saying my parents want to meet you… if he still gives me excuses then he had some other intentions and reasons to leave.(maybe he lost interest..i don’t think so but still who knows)

Iam here thinking it’s because of caste so it’s hurting me more. If he’ll say he’s ready to meet my parents even if not very soon then I’ll try to convince my parents to atleast meet him. If he makes excuses or says he don’t have the courage … I’ll still be hard, I’ll have multiple breakdowns but atleast I’ll be clear that this is not gonna happen even if i convince my parents as he never had it in him.

When i ask for my certificates they don’t give me my certificates …i don’t know what i want to do in career.i am so confused

My parents are coming to see in two days…..I feel it’s hard for them but they do love me……I tell myself again and again not to talk about this to them.But still giving up isn’t in me or what idk.My mother has said one two times that we are with you.My physical health has also deteriorated over this period.will seeing me like this make them change their mind.I am sorry if I am being too adamant or selfish.I just can’t see anything beyond him ..like my brain has shut down on so many things. I am forcing it too much. I feel like discussing it with him if there’s any possible way. His family has only one concern as far as I know that is my family’s acceptance. my mother sometimes says she and my father we are with you focus on your career then if you want to get married to him marry him. I relax and start focusing on career but then next day she says again she can’t do it and I hate them more for manipulating me or what. I guess nobody can help me. There’s no hope. No one of them is understanding what i am going through. HE on the other hand tells me time tells me time will heal this and then wears the watch I gave him everywhere. Even in his brothers wedding he wore that watch and does stupid things like putting my hair in his wallet when i said I am having lot of hair fall. It’s making me feel more idiot as I am writing this. BUT everyday is hard. I feel like talking it out with him and my parents who say focus on the career which is very hard in this fear he’ll get married to someone else.

Sometimes my father says things like this that are very mean and hurts me so much then in the next moment he is completely opposite.He himself have struggled with same issues with his parents.And my father doesn’t talk to my grandfather for more than 20 years now.History is repeating itself and my father doesn’t seem to correct it.He is doing the same things I guess what my grandfather used to do.or to some extent.I don’t know where to start from to atleast not ruin this more.Many times previously before this incident i tried to sort things out between me and my father.it so happened that for a week things would be okay but then one fine day we’ll end up in a heated debate then only when we stopped talking to each other there was peace in the house.I feel shattered. Don’t know what i wrong with me as well. Why can’t I be at peace even after accepting that this is how it is. Why do I feel I’ll never end up with a good person and peaceful life. And so much burdened by the pressure of taking care of my parents as I have no sibling. And that too with so much of indifference towards them.