Frederick,

Wow, your posting brings me back to my hormone raging young adulthood. First of all, enjoy it while the intensity lasts. It’s just one aspect being human. Just PLEASE, direct it appropriately.

Anita is right about not involving the food delivery guy, or anyone else without their knowledge and consent. Many of our ‘sisters’ are murdered by males enraged by our existence. Do not put yourself into a situation of randomly running into one. From a moral perspective, would you like to be brought into someone’s sexual scene without your knowledge and consent? Especially if it is something disagreeable to you?

If you can, visit a nearby GLBT community center, school LGBT club or something along those lines. There are tons of online places too. Chances are you’ll find others to connect with. If not with similar interests, then at least you’re with relatively safe people who accept where you are coming from. A LGBT & kink affirming therapist is a great idea for helping you learn to direct your sensuality in a safe and sane manner. And meditation helps!!!!

In the long term, perhaps connecting with a straight crossdressing organization (e.g. Tri-Ess), or a Drag Family / House, ‘Ball Culture’ or similar will help you find your people. There are many choices out there now. Thank goodness for the internet! Ideally, you might even find mentor(s) for life advice, make up, dressing, passing, etc… Maybe even a safe venue to find compatible guys into you. Be patient, eventually you’ll find your place. And yes, you’ll likely make mistakes along the way. That’s part of becoming an adult.

XOXO

Stefanie