Honour,

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I too, am in a same-sex marriage and my partner is angry with me, but unwilling to do any work right now towards repairing our relationship, even though they say they want to give it a shot. Our situations are similar. I myself struggle with childhood trauma. I realized a year ago, that I could not rely on a partner to do all of the emotional work needed to recover from that past damage. I agree with Anita that it seems like her sickness is in control. It is such a hard situation. Is she in therapy at all? It’s very difficult to work with a partner who isn’t also willing to work with you, and in this situation, it seems like if she won’t talk with you about working towards a solution of health, no matter how slowly, your situation won’t change, but may get worse as you reach your limits.I hope you’re able to have a healthy conversation about what you both need to move forward in health.

A