Dee Dee, you took the first step of sharing your challenge and seeking help. Consider that encouraging. Right now you are lacking confidence and faith in yourself and don’t see any value in who you are. I challenge that. There was something you wrote that you glossed over in your story, something extraordinary and beautiful and giving. You gave up a semester of your schooling to allow a friend to complete hers and you financed it. You unselfishly gave someone else and extraordinary gift and sacrificed your own progress so that she could succeed. How does that make you feel? Can you allow yourself to feel uplifted and good and worthy for this action? Can you create a little space in the cloak of despair that you are experiencing to allow yourself to feel your value?

You don’t actually need to do things like this to be worthy of love and compassion but it’s clear that you have a thoughtful and generous nature – this is who you are. We all have our demons and it takes daily practice and a network of support to keep those demons in line. The demons don’t go away but our light gets brighter as we practice being compassionate and loving to ourselves and, by extension, to others. Remember who you are in your core – thoughtful and generous and reflective are just a handful of your qualities – and each day practice those things so that your light expands from the inside out. As with anything, you will have good days and bad days. Do not give up on yourself on the bad days and have your support network close by. You can do this.