From my Point of view I just want to say that I think your boyfriend is in limit. May be you are not from alcoholic background, that’s why you are thinking a lot.
Blaice I can understand the pain you are going with. I can only give you advice. I don’t feel you can continue like this for your whole life. You can contact her directly and express your current feelings or you have to enter to someone’s new life in order to move on. Finally you have to decide which persons you have to take along with your life.
You are going through a big pain. IF you really missing him in your life for your children too. Lets talk to him and express your feelings and views honestly. Take that part and whatever be the decision , you have to except that which will make you proceed in your life in an ease.
I think in participating stuffs and many other arrangements, you can get a chance to involve with others, you have to meet different personalities and get mix up. It will make your life colorful. Honestly try this.