Wow Luna, my above post had a mind of its own, LOL. Don’t know what happened there but let me try this again…

Anita’s third paragraph explains the “deeper love” that I was referring to in my post very well. That is what deeper love is all about… it’s about giving, first.

Your bf made the relationship about him, that is the only perspective that he saw. I can tell that you truly loved him because you valued him enough to see things from his perspective throughout the relationship.

Just remember, the worthy person in your future will also see it that way. And when people show us who they truly are – believe them!

Luna I can empathize with you. To answer your questions, I don’t feel he was pretending, at least until the 1^st break up. Has he been immature about  it as you asked? Well, his actions sure show that YES he has.

What’s happening here is just so very common. Once the “in-love” or “limerence” phase in a relationship ends (usually a year plus or minus or so) the transition to what is known as a deeper love then has to take place. LOTS of people don’t know how to transition from “in-love to” to a “deeper love”.

Usually the person that is committed most and understand what a deeper love looks like is the one that can transition the best at this crucial time of a relationship. Also, this person understands “butterflies” don’t last forever.

Then there’s the person who thinks “butterflies” has to be present at all times during of a relationship. And when the butterflies leave – so do they – discarding their past love interest like a used washing machine. He appears to be chasing this shallow type love. Some out grow this and many do not. You are both young and still learning through experience. Hugs.