Oh God this is me. I literally broke up with him 6 hours ago. And I’m already hurting. Except I don’t think I can ask for him back ever. He’s been in love with me for 5 years but I only started dating him about 6 months ago. The first few months were great. He treated me like a queen. But then I don’t know what happened, I just stopped feeling the same way. I would look for excuses to not talk to him, I would actively avoid him, and then yesterday I simply couldn’t tell him I loved him without feeling guilty. But literally 6 hours after having a difficult break up with him, I find myself missing him so much it’s hurting. Did I take a rash decision? Did I mess up a good thing? I can’t imagine being in the headspace I was in last night when I couldn’t stomach the thought of saying I love you. Or is this just me being lonely?

Either way, I know I do not have a chance of getting him back. I rejected him once a few years ago and he did not take it well at all so his friends got super protective. Then I started dating him again and he was so happy, but now I have dumped him again. I know already that I want to get back, but I don’t think it will last. I am all over the place. It’s so much pain.