Jeff ~ I wonder if you could have ever imagined when you wrote your story, that it would be a blessing to another person? Please know that it was. It was a blessing to me to know I am not alone in this painful journey, I truly know how you feel.
I am in the final steps of ending my 22 year marriage and have never felt so utterly alone. That feeling that although one moves through their day; going to work, running errands, attending school functions they are alone in all they do. Like yourself, my spouse came home one day and announced that he no longer loved me, wanted out of our marriage, and was moving in with his 26 yr. co-worker and wanted to “be free of a family”. I was already numb from having buried my Mom a month earlier, and now the life I’d come to wear so comfortably was being ripped apart, and the thought of now having to navigate uncharted waters was overwhelming to me. All that I knew (or what I’d thought I knew) to be real and true, had become smoke and mirrors and I began to think that my whole life since I was 20 yrs old had been a lie.

What brought me to where I am now was the sobering understanding that I was now responsible to lead our children out of this terrible dark hole they had been thrusted into. This has not been easy, they were both starting high school when their father walked away. And truly there must be a very special place in the heavens for single mothers raising young sons. WOW what challenge that is! But through all the heartache, financial woes and tears something very beautiful has emerged; the knowledge that I will be play a very big part in all of my children’s life events.
My daughter is a senior in college and has been accepted to medical school, and my son will graduate with high honors from his high school next week and will be attending a Big 10 university this fall.

I can’t say I’ve figured out all of questions as to why this happened in my life, but I do know that I NEVER would have become who I am now, had I not gone through this. I try to surround myself with positive thoughts; posted on the fridge or on my office wall, and one that I am truly fond of is this _
Become the Buffalo!….When a storm begins to desend on the plains, cows will run to find shelter from it. But the mighty Buffalo will charge head first into the storm, thereby getting through to the Sun shining on the otherside all the faster. When storms of life rage against you, put your head down and push as hard as you can through it, for in doing so you will become the Buffalo” ~ Wilma Mankiller – First Female Chief of the Cherokee Nation

Your pain and confusion are not in vain, even if the purpose hasn’t been made clear, it will with time. For right now though, please know that realizing another has endurded this difficult path, has brought peace to me….and has made me feel less alone.

Stay strong & I will praying for peace to find you very soon.