The logic definitely helps, thank you! When you put it that way it is understandable…

But then also logically, since he chose his wife, doesn’t that make her better? Or given what he used me for (out of anger, distraction, boredom, etc) what does that logically say about me?

Reading the previous posts does help. Especially since many people here actually seem to have a bad opinion of him. A small part of me takes comfort in that even though he is still the “married, happy one”.

Thank you all so much for responding. I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around this. As much as I’d like to believe he isn’t happy or that he is simply a jerk, I can’t seem to find evidence for it. In fact, he is very intelligent, hard-working and charming. He just received a promotion at work. Everyone seems to love him and his wife. That leads me to believe that his opinion of me, that I am nothing more than garbage, must be true. And what should I do with that knowledge? How can I continue to face him everyday knowing that?

The one thing that is very clear regardless of anything else is that he does not care about me. I can’t seem to find any other solution to that problem. Because even if it’s just a show (and it can’t ALL be a show) he obviously cares about his wife. It is so much easier to believe that they are happy and in love.
How should I feel about being used, dumped and now forgotten?
Very dramatic, I know. 🙂

In response to D… He really does seem quite happy. Even seeing me at work everyday he is very relaxed and social (with everyone else). In fact, he just got a promotion and a raise. He is talking about his plans for his wife’s upcoming birthday.
Anita, doesn’t that seem lie my hurt doesn’t really matter? At least not to him. But since he appears to be doing everything he can to be a good, loving husband perhaps this isn’t the horrible thing that Evan Cox seems to be suggesting? The only conclusion I can draw from this experience is that I am not worthy of love. So what should I do then? I cannot be angry at him for loving his wife. In fact, I should be very happy for him.

“Perhaps the thought of losing everything he already had gave him a renewed appreciation of what he was risking…” I think it’s thoughts like these that are making this so hard for me. If his marriage wasn’t a fairytale then maybe it could be now? So how should I feel? Should I forgive him and be his friend? Was it okay that he just used me as long as it was convenient or for as long as he was angry at his wife?

To answer Anita’s questions… We were coworkers for years, even before his actual marriage. We become friends and he confided to me one day that his marriage was having troubles. And then one night after work he told me he had feelings for me. From the beginning he told me he was going to get a divorce. Of course, I am just stupid and gullible for believing him.

He really does seem quite happy now. They are going on a second honeymoon of sorts in a month.